Locking a child in his room

Question

My son and his wife lock my grandson in his room most days from Noon until 4 pm for "nap time" and he is 2 1/2 years old.  He is not allowed downstairs during the time.  Another sibling told me that when they visit during that time,  they can hear my grandson yell from upstairs.  He has also been smearing feces on the wall whilst in his room.  The fact they lock him in his room is quite upsetting to me.  It seems to me that it's lazy parenting and they just don't want to be bothered.  My guess is that he is acting out his anger about being locked up there every day.  Am I out of line if I think this is horribly inappropriate?

anne5448 · Answer

i am a grandmother of ten and if i found out any of there parents were doing this i would firstly confront them.this is child abuse i agree with specialmum this should be reported if anythink serius happend to your grandchild you would never forgive yourself.why not put the child into a nursery if they have no time for him but please dont let this poor soul suffer any more........

Julie359 · Answer

My heart goes out to this little boy, poor fellow. I know this is going to be an extremely tough desicion to make seeing as you are his granmother, but if after a chat to the father does nothing to improve the situation then you really need to do the right thing here and call child protection or social services to go an investigate the family home. If they are locking him up in the bedroom for 4 hours each day, i can only imagine that the rest of the care he receives isn't up to much either. Is he clean? Does he get proper meals? Is he a happy child? What is his behaviour like in general? There are a whole host of questions that come to mind........

RockRose · Answer

I agree with everyone.  I don't know who is locking this child away all this time - if its the mother,  the father,  or both.  I can't tell who the "other sibling" is,  if it's a child of the father or mother who visits,  etc.

This is a horrible situation, and it will escalate.  I think he's smearing feces out of total boredom.  

I never say this,  but this warrants a call to CPS.  This child is in real danger in the future when he becomes more mobile so they devise better and better devises to keep him out of their sight.

margypops · Answer

I agree with the others here you are not out of line , ask for help for your grandchild whatever it costs you with their relationship, this is not okay ...

specialmom · Answer

In my opinion, this is in need of immediate attention.  This is borderline abuse and if I found a neighbor doing this, I'd call child services.  In our city, someone did something similar and the child died during that time.  The parents are in jail.  

It is one thing to insist on a nap-------  quite another to lock a child in for hours every day and you must act now to stop this horrible act of "parenting".  good luck

mammo · Answer

This breaks my heart.  There are better ways to get your child to nap, and this is starting to affect him in an adverse way.  This is so sad.  You're in a tough situation, but I would take your son aside and talk with him.  He has to be the one that approaches his wife so that you aren't caught in the middle.  If children this age are tired, once they are made to lay down, they will fall asleep, this child obviously isn't tired, or is terrified of being locked up for so long.  You definitely need to talk to your son, I'm sure you know how to handle it.  Point out how this is affecting their child and it will stay with him.  Just be careful not to do it in a condescending way.  You have to be this child's advocate, he only has you to get this taken care of for his well being.  I wish you luck, and hope you can get this worked out.  Take care.....