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My 2 and half year son out of control to us.

My 2 and half year son out of control to us. He's getting angry every time and crying. We are very time trying to do what he want but not use. As an example some time he asking need to go toilet. When we bring him to toilet again he's telling can't go to toilet. Then if we ask him to ok don't go to toilet again he crying and asking need to go toilet. He not like to agree with us for any things. When get angry He's hitting to us and he is hitting to himself as well. Sometimes he hitting to the wall by his head when he got angry. This is now big problem to our life and my wife really fed up with that. Pls give me to direction how we can overcome from this problem. Thanks. Rajitha
2 Responses
973741 tn?1342342773
Oh my gosh, two year olds!  They can drive you crazy!!  The thing to remember about them is that they are learning to communicate.  They are limited so lots of what they say or do doesn't make sense and is almost 'primitive' in nature.  What we can do as parents is help them along.  We can give them the words they are trying to learn.  Hitting you or themselves in frustration is probably because they don't know what to do with what they feel inside.  So, we help them by role modeling or acting it out.  You can say "no hit" but you do THIS when upset.  And then you show them things that are appropriate.  things like using your words (me mad, me sad, help me, etc.).  You can make 'helping hands'  This is a good outlet activity for kids . . . you use finger paint and have him make a picture of his own hands.  Then hang it on the wall at his level.  Teach him to go to the hands when upset and push against his helping hands.  This is really calming to kids.  You can give him a 'cool down' spot where he goes when upset. When there, no one can bug him and he stays by himself calming down.  An enclosed space is good for this like a pop up tent, under a little table, a rocking chair tucked away. We had our cool down place behind a chair and had pillows there.  We called it the pillow pile and it is where my son went to cool off.  You can teach him to take birthday candle breathes to calm down.  You hold out fingers and blow at the tips like trying to blow out birthday candles, nice and slow.  this is a breathing exercise that calms kids too.  I think they teach it on Sesame Street!  

Potting training at 2 is very frustrating for all involved. Most kids, and especially boys, have a hard time potty training at two.  The average age for boys is 3.5 years old to get potty training.  So be positive.

There is a book "hands are not for hitting" you can get on Amazon which is great for teaching that we don't hit.

Again, back to role playing to teach . . . you can act out something that makes you made that is similar to something that makes him mad.  Role play it dramatically!  And add the things he SHOULD do.  Praise like his best cheerleader whenever he does those things or makes good choices.  

But know that two is a hard age for some kids.  Three and four are pretty difficult too but by 5, it will be much better.  LOL  Hang in there.  The toddler years are long and rough but lots of good times sprinkled in too!
189897 tn?1441126518
COMMUNITY LEADER
I agree with Specialmom completely.  He is not out of control, in fact, he is close to being somewhat normal for a child who has not been taught how to communicate.   Specialmom mentioned a very good book.  I would also suggest, When I feel angry.      https://www.amazon.com/When-Feel-Angry-Way-Books/dp/0807588970/ref=pd_sbs_14_6?_encoding=UTF8&pd_rd_i=0807588970&pd_rd_r=56a03904-833b-11e8-a101-fb9e1a980f76&pd_rd_w=NNi1J&pd_rd_wg=9ft4T&pf_rd_i=desktop-dp-sims&pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_p=5825442648805390339&pf_rd_r=3GNYDP1Y6KFFH8FVVMVQ&pf_rd_s=desktop-dp-sims&pf_rd_t=40701&refRID=3GNYDP1Y6KFFH8FVVMVQ&th=1

This book and others like it in the "Way I Feel Series"  are meant to be read out loud many times to your child and then practiced.   They will really help you.
Best wishes.
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189897 tn?1441126518
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