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My 3 and 4 year old Wont Poop in Toilet

Please offer some advice! I am panicked because my 4 yr old will turn 5 next month and of course start kindergarten soon.  Both my 3 and 4 yr old have never gone to daycare. My daughter is 4 and the oldest, she was potty trained at early at 1 and couple of months with both poop and pee. My son is 13 months behind her, we tried potty training my son at 2 and that's when my daughter regressed.  Also around this time their dad and I separated abruptly.  I at first thought this was the triggering factor, but now this has gone on for almost 2 years now.  I have tried positive reinforcement, taking away outdoors, regulating their diet, making them sit for a time on the toilet.  I have gotten very little success. And when one is doing better, the other keeps pooping on themselves, eventually the other goes back to it.  I am becoming very concerned.  I hope its not an emotionally issue, my kids are very smart (most people consider them advanced in communication skills).  Everyone is wondering, as well as I why they decide to poop on themselves versus going to the bathroom.  I see them standing stiff at times, as if they are trying to hold it in.  I then tell them to go to the bathroom.  They sit there and don't do anything.  Then 5 minutes later, they've done it on themselves. I hate punishing them for this, because my gut tells me that I am missing something and have done little to help and more to contribute to the problem. Please advise.

This discussion is related to 4 year old pooping in his pants at preschool.
1 Responses
5914096 tn?1399918987
I think that the very first thing you should do is to consult with the pediatrician to determine if there is a medical or an emotional issue contributing to this behavior.  It is difficult to make any other recommendations until these two issues are ruled out.
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