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My 8 year old is urinating frequently in his room and has been doing for 2+ years

My 8 year old is urinating frequently in his room and has been doing for 2+ years.
I first came to notice it when he was 6 years old  he would urinate behind his bedroom door at night. His room was very close to the bathroom and he had plenty of lights on to keep him from being afraid.
(He is also a frequent bed-wetter and uses pull-ups at night)
I took away privileges, talked to him about it and even tried punishment without any success.
We moved last year into a brand new house and  he started again its now to the point that his carpet is ruined and needs to be replaced. I also found feces wiped on things in his room or the bathrooms and he refuses to flush the toilet most days.
He was also hiding this dirty pull-ups in his closet and drawers rather then tossing them away. Now he hides the clean pull-up and wets the bed.
I tried to take him to a professional but they refused to even see him "Until we were retrained as parents, because kids just don't act out unless you've done the wrong things".
Which is very insulting since he knew nothing about us and made assumptions not based in fact.
He also has anger and listening issues, he tells lies all the time and will not admit the truth even when caught red handed and he would rather get in someones face then admit he's in the wrong.
Nothing I've done as punishments or rewards seem to work.
He's never been abused or neglected and I even talked to him and strangers/friends and family and bad touching just to be sure.
The thing that kills me is he's a different kid at school polite and at the top of his class but outside of school he changes.This is effecting how my family lives
He understands and is embarrassed about his room and refuses to bring friends upstairs to keep them from finding out his secret,even that doesn't stop the behavior.
Any advice on how to handle this behavior would be appreciated.
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1 Answers
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242606 tn?1243786248
This situation demands professional intervention. I would ignore the prior response you received, move beyond it and arrange an evaluation with a pediatric mental health professional.
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