Disturbing thoughts from my 5 year old!!

[worriedmum192]

Hi there, has anyone ever experienced the following behaviour from their children. My 5 year old daughter has recently started saying disturbing/awful things to me such as "I want to kill you" I want to hurt you & everyone else" "Why is my brain telling me these bad things & how do I make them stop, mummy?" She gets very upset to the point of crying that she cannot seem to control these feelings & emotions?? She wants to stop having these thoughts but yet still carries on. I've tried everything! Taking away toys/telly, trying to reason with her, reassuring her that the bad thoughts will go etc but it still continues. "I want to burn you.... but I won't" "you're horrible mummy .... but you're a beautiful princess mummy" I'm at my wits end!! I've tried disapplining, which made it ALOT worse, I've tried making light of what she's saying & brushing it off, I've tried ignoring her when she says these things which I find most effective out of all methods. We should be looking forward to Christmas, instead I'm deeply hurting & worried that my daughter has some early signs of mental or behavioural problems. Otherwise, she is generally a plesant, polite & kind child. It's like another side has suddenly appeared. It also seems to solely be aimed at me, the mother. My husband hears her comments but she's adamant she only wants to say them to me. What am I doing wrong!? Any help or advise on this would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

The generla standard of care for someone who displays serious OCD is a combination of medication and therapy. This condition is treatable. Are we more reluctant to emply medication with very young children? Yes. But there are medication options that are safe for young children.

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

This presentation is symptomatic of a type of anxiety disorder called obsessive-type Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder. The child experiences intrusive thoughts (obsessions) that are distressing to the child, and result in a need to confess (compulsion) the thoughts. It's best to handle it in a casual manner and not to engage in any extensive exploration or discussion. Just ask: "What might help you now?" and respond to her. It would be prudent to arrange an evaluation with a pediatric mental health professional. This condiiton is primarily biological in nature and does not indicate any wrongdoing or mistake on the part of the parents.

[worriedmum192]

Thank you so much for getting back to me. I have since researched OCD & it does sounds exactly the behaviour my daughter is displaying. It's tearing me apart to the point I woke up with chest pains in the night! I just can't seem to do anything to stop the thoughts. I know with OCD, I can't & that's what worried me. How she'll have this for the rest of our lives is tragic! With her being only 5 however, do you not think there's anyway she could grow out of it? What would be the treatment process. Could just a minor be prescribed medication? Any advise is much appreciated, thanks.

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

The standard of care for treating serious OCD is generally a combination of medication and therapy. The first step would be to arrange the evaluation and go from there. Are we conservative about use of medication with young children? Yes. But there are perfectly reasonable medication options, even for children who are quite young. If the condition truly is OCD, children do not 'grow out' of this because the condition involves dysregulation of brain chemistry (the reason for the use of medication). OCD is a biologically-related emotional disorder.