Try to explain your husband that you son does not soil his pants to make dad's life miserable
He is probably holding his bowels in and gets constipated
Spanking can make a bigger issue of it than it is
Good luck
My husband just informed me that he is going to begin spanking my 4 year old for having small poop accidents in his pants. I am heartbroken. I have e-mailed his pedi to get other ideas but the husband is beyond being patient. I have my son sit on the potty after most meals to let him poop and he usually does. But he still leaks some on most days. I have done reward charts, big toys, and small treats and nothing is working. He cries when his bottom gets sore and knows it is because he pooped in his pants. I am so frustrated and just don't want him to get spanked.
i dont believe that spanking helps with potty training. when a child is really ready to use the toilet there will be signs.
Spanking is NOT child abuse UNLESS you hit them in the head, stomach, or any other areas that could cause serious damage. No, society has not progressed past this and probably never will. There is a huge difference in spanking and child abuse. A little pat on the tush and a parent beating a child are completely two different things.
I do agree that spanking is not the answer for potty training. A reward system might be the way to go. If you have tried reward systems before and failed, try a different type of reward. Something your child is REALLY into.
Thank you, Countnefarious!! I know this comment is a little late, but I just ran across this today when googling about potty training.
Wow, I cannot imagine how it would possibly make sense that hitting a child would help them poop in the potty. It's a sensitive enough skill to learn, without adding pain to the mix- much less, pain caused by the parent! Aren't parents supposed to protect the child?
If your kid isn't fully potty trained by six, THAT is when I'd worry. I worked at many daycares and have had my own child and I've learned that every child is different when it comes to potty learning. They figure it out in their own time, and smacking them when they don't do it your way is just counter productive, insulting, and cruel.
I meant, take Encephalomalcia's advice.
NEVER, NEVER, NEVER spank your child!!!!! I thought society had progressed beyond this primitive technique. Aside from the obvious cruelty in such an act, it's proven to be largely ineffective. Take zekesunhapmom's advice.
My son has had trouble with pooping and I'd take a bullet over hitting him! It IS child abuse.
It could be that he just does not have the control yet over his bowel movement. It may not be intentional, it may be physical. Spanking does not help and will only make things worse. Children get potty trained and most of the time if they are not pressured, they will get potty trained. Pride in going potty on the toilet is a good thing. When he goes on the toilet let him know how proud you are of him and give him a big hug. Accidents happen. Ask any preschool teacher and the teacher will say that accidents happen even with 4 and 5 years olds. No pressure. Be positive when he goes potty on the toilet.