Three year old son peeing on bedroom floor

[OtterMN]

My son, who turns four at the end of November, began peeing getting out of bed in the middle of the night and peeing on his bedroom floor. For about a two week period he also began defecating on an article of clothing, which he would then throw in his closet. He has been toilet trained since his third birthday. His excuse is that there is a spider in the bathroom, and he's scared of it. One day there was  small spider in the bathroom, but we got rid of it. We've had to remove everything from his room, and rip out his carpeting. I thought we had cured him of this after we removed his carpeting, but he's started doing it again. I'm at a total loss at what to do.... we've tried reasoning, grounding, spanking... I just can't spank him anymore. Please help, I'm really losing it... thank you.

DBO

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

His message to you is that he is scared at night when he wakes up. It's likely that this is what is prompting his behavior. Talk with him about 'how can we solve this - what will make it better?'  Fear can be a powerful force, even causing him to do something that he knows might well result in punishment. See if he has some ideas about how he can feel safer when he wakes up at night to use the bathroom. If, for a while, he has to come to get you to accompany him, that would be OK. He will not consistently wake up during the night.

[confused426]

jdtm, good observation. the only thing that makes me think he isnt sleepwalking is the fact he hides his #2 accidents in the closet. a sleepwalker wouldnt try to hide it i think.

[jdtm]

Is your son sleep-walking?  Our son used to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night and urinate into the bathtub.  He was not totally aware of what he was doing - was able to go to the bathroom but not able to "find" the toilet.  He was half-asleep and half-awake.  Just a thought ...