We have an appt with OT finally

[benjimom]

I finally got my son's OT eval back for Sensory processing disorder and we hve an appt. wanted to do it at the local children's hospital, but they have a 5-6 month waitin list, so I found another place that insurance covers.  I am relieved.  

My son has been having power struggles mainly in the mornings lately getting to school and other activities, some days are better than others.  Lately, I wish I knew what to do about this, but he has started to scream at times. I live in a townhome and my neighbor complained to the office.  NOw I feel even under MORE stress.  It's just hard to know what to do. I feel so battle fatigued and run over!! I explained to the office about it and said I'm sorry and also asked the nieghbor not to come to my door, she came to my door once about it and it's very uncomfortable. I don't need the EXTRA stress of dealing with her.  

I hope this therapy will help!!

[lis51]

How did you notice first notice your son´s having the disorder? What led you to look for a diagnosis?

[specialmom]

Benjimom, you sure can.  I've had those same looks and moments of humiliation.  I've been humbled to my very core many times.  But I remember that my son is a beautiful, awesome boy and I do what I do for him.  Those strangers that don't know him do not matter.  So I smile right back at those folks and think about the wisdom this journey has given me.  While life may have been easier with a different child . . . it would have been much duller!  I'd not trade my child for the world and while he is still mine to take care of, I will  help him face those nasty looks.  And I do believe in karma.  I wish nothing on anyone, but I have found that some of the least compassionate people eventually have a situation in their life in which they will need compassion.  Then they finally get it.  

But you are not alone.  You set out for small goals.  Having more good days than bad is the first step.  You'll get there.  You are doing all that you should and trying so hard.  I really believe you are putting in place the things your boy will need to be successful in this world.  I just know it.  You are doing a great job!

[benjimom]

Yes the mood issues are the most stressful b/c it can hard to get under control and you hate it to happen out in public.  People look and stare.  People are not always very understanding when you have child issues.  It's tough b/c they probaly don't understand what you are dealing with, etc.  Think bad parenting...  I'm glad to know I'm not alone. YOu ahve been SO helpful specialmom!! You can feel pretty alone dealing with child issues!!

[specialmom]

Yes.  My son can have a meltdown that is way way over the top.  Like on the ground thrashing, screaming, crying . . . and he is 6.  It is part of sensory because he can not self soothe.  So while most people can do something, or say something in their head or whatever to help themselves feel better------  he can't.   He can also get mad super easy over nothing.  Or something will be wrong and then everything is wrong.  It can be exhausting.  The stress thermometer really really helped him (and therefore, us).  He can see for himself when he is not feeling "just right" and getting agitated.  He notices as he is going up the thermometer in mood and the goal is to stop it before he blows.  When he uses the thermometer, my hope is that when I'm not there, that we've worked on it enough that he can see his own mood changing and do something about it before an outburst occurs.  

But regulation of mood is the most difficult part of sensory in my opinion.  It is for us.  It creates the most stress and worry for me.  

[benjimom]

Thanks Specialmom, I hope I am doing the right things. It's so hard and it's been so hard.   Right now, I am just focusing on what is best for my son. I really don't have time to focus on what is going on with other's and what is bothering them.  We sleep at night and we don't party!!  and we don't play loud music or have loud TVs on.  With a kid, it's tough to keep it ALWAYS quiet.

Sometimes the trigger is going to school or going to other activities.  This AM, I tink the trigger was he got up too early adn was tired.  I will cont. to do my best, no guarantees of always great mornings, but we can try our best!

DId your son used to lose his temper a lot, it just seems like they lose control over their bodies.  IT's really distressing to me and doubly distressing to hink someone is reporting me to the office!!  It  really makes me feel bad about things.

[specialmom]

I'm so glad you are starting OT!!!  That is wonderful.  I'd talk to them right away about managing the screaming and control of his temper.  We've worked on that with our son and things have gotten better.  Take what they say and put it to practice at home.  Try the stress thermometer that I once gave you as well as it really helps us to stop a situation from escalating to the point of yelling.

Think about what triggers the morning struggle and problem solve how to make it better.  YOu've been through a lot and I really hope it gets better. I think it will!  I really do.  You've done all the right things and are doing the best you can.  I think you are ready for some success to come  your way!!

Sorry about the neighbor.  That is tough.  I imagine that it would be awkward to tell her about your son's diagnosis------------  and she may be the type to not care.  Just keep calm yourself and put into place some of the behavioral strategies.  I'll be thinking of you.