Weight loss help for 9 year old

[Claudna]

My daughter has always been on the heavy side and seems to carry much of her weight in her abdomen. As young as 10 months old, stranger at a public pool asked " what is wrong with her belly?". She thinks about food constantly. I have tried to limit quantities but I now know she has been stealing food for a while.  Currently she is 5'1"" and weighs about 135 pounds. I am trying to change things pretty radically in terms of eliminating junk from the house since I now assume she will just sneak it when I'm not around.  My other kids are normal weight, my husband and I are lean.  I have also tried to cook the right amount of food for meals with none left over to decrease requests for seconds and thirds. She gets some teasing about her weight and has cried a couple of times to me about wanting to be thinner like her sister, but then five minutes later will be asking when can we have donuts.  She is obsessed with food as well, mentioning many times each day things she'd like to eat soon.  Can you describe an approach or plan I might take and also provide info as to a calorie goal per day that I should aim for?  

[Sandman2]

    When I think back to when I was teaching 5th grade, I had several kids who were taller than me.  Most of them were also very heavy for a 5th grader.  They all wound up being very good athletes by the way.  But, I do think that at this age it is tough when you are going through a growing spurt to keep the weight off.  And I do think that this growing spurt is a large part of the problem.  osgood-schlatter is almost guaranteed during this time.  I have had lots of kids with that.
   Anyway, as I said earlier.  She needs to eat more often so she won't be as hungry at mealtimes.  Get some of those chocolate Whey protein powders that you mix with water for after swimming for example.  They have a pretty low calorie count and the protein is important.  
   I do think the idea of a pediatric nutritionist or even a sport nutritionist is a good idea.   She will probably keep growing for awhile and she will need fuel for this.  Its just important to get it right.  And they can give you some good snack ideas.
   Fortunately, girls do stop growing sooner then boys, but she may well be the tallest kid in her class until close to high school.  And this is not easy to deal with for many kids.   Sports will be an important outlet for her and I am glad to see that you have her so involved.  The osgood-schlatter is going to be a pain and may change some of the sports she is in for awhile.  Fortunately swimming will help her. If I remember correctly, the more you can develop the quads - they better they take pressure off the knee.  Impact sports like basketball might get difficult.  I think that unless she does a lot of jumping in practice, volleyball may be ok.  Just make sure her coaches are aware of the osgood-schlatter.  And it might be worth finding a good sports medicine doc to get their opinion on how to cope.  Its much more common these days with the way kids are growing.
    Hey, this is going to be a bit of a challenge.  And if I am right about her continuing to grow,  you really need to watch her self concept.  But, all in all, it should work out and you will have a ball watching her grow up!  Enjoy!!
  

[Claudna]

Hi, thanks for all of your advice. I will answer some of the questions in saw in the responses...my husband is 6'1" and I am 5'6". My twins ( one boy, one girl) are among the taller kids in their grade.  They are 11, but they are the same height as the daughter whonis overeating.  Someone mentioned that my daughter is very tall and it's true. Most of her friends only come upnto her shoulder. Excersize was mentioned, she is involved in the most sports of my three kids. During he course of this past year she was on two different basketball teams, a volleyball team and played fall and springbsoccer. She asks tong swimming every day now that it's summer and I would say I take her 4 or 5 times a week.   Unfortunately she has one developed osgood-schlatter, a painful knee condition that is related to sports and growth spurts, and thatsvlimiting long walks. The mainstays of treatment are just NSAIDs and stretches. I doubt that she has a significant medical condition causing weight gain since she has had this big belly  and appetite literally since birth.  Medical causes for weight gain would not have gone on in a child for 9 years without other symptoms related to the medical condition becoming apparent.  My husband and I are both doctors, though for adults, not kids, so I could explore a little further with her pediatrician fir something we might have overlooked.  I'm not sure in agree with the emotional flashpoint type of reasoning. That's something that comes up a lot with eating, and I think it is a really valid point in general, but taking her as an individual and knowing that there has literally never been a time that I wasn't having to look for clothes that were avlittle bigger itbseems unlikely to me that she has emotional eating since before she could even walk.  Maybe I can't see the forest for the trees, so I'll give it more thought.  I'm hesitant to see a counselor because I do agree with the poster who said we really need to make her feel we love her and do t disapprove of her. When I have tried to bring anything up with her she gets embarrassed and upset.  My thiinking now is to try to just make it more difficult to take in lots of extra calories.  Not as easy as it so ds in today's world though, especially if the child's friends don't have weight issues and moms are constantly trying to push giant Costco cupcakes at them.  I do have to say, since my initial post the food talk seems to have decreased somewhat.  I'm trying to refocus her attention, and it's baby steps but I'll keep you posted. All comments were much appreciated. Thanks very much.

[adgal]

Everyone else has given you fabulous advice, but I do have something I would like to add if I may.  I think your smart to now be keeping junk food out of the house altogether.  As Sandman says, kids need 3 meals and 3 snacks per day, more if they are on a growth spurt.  So I would keep lots of fruits and veggies so that they are cut up, ready to go and easily accessible to her.  I would just keep things like cookies, donuts, etc. out of the house altogether.  And then I would increase exercise through fun activities as a family.  Going to the park and kicking the soccer ball around, bike riding, lots of walks, swimming, etc.  Make it really fun and a time to spend together.  In addition to helping her be healthy, you'll be teaching lifelong good habits and doing it this way will help her feel like she is not being singled out or feel badly about herself.  Being overweight is so hard on kids, both health wise and socially.  I think your a wonderful mother to be addressing this and have no doubt she will be where she should be soon.

Another thing you could do is see a pediatric nutritionist.  I have seen one for my son who has the opposite problem...was underweight.  She provided me with fabulous healthy recipes that are kid friendly and gave me excellent advice.  I highly recommend utilizing the services of one.  Best of luck to you!

[skepticalpeach]

I agree with what everyone else said, talk to a doctor and she is probably going through a growth spurt. She is so young, it would be very hard for her to control herself on her own. Eating can become addictive and you get cravings that are oh so difficult to ignore. Unless you have a medical problem, you gain weight when you eat much more calories than you are burning. Is she involved in any sports? Can she play soccer or join a swim team? (hockey, basketball, etc). If you got her a dog would she walk it? I would approach the subject very gently. Tell her you love her and that you will help her. She doesn't need to feel bad about herself, everything will be ok!

[Sandman2]

   By the way, some pretty good resources that should help you are here -
        http://www.medhelp.org/weight-loss?section=articles

[Sandman2]

    The more I think about it, the more the (I assume) rapid growth in height could explain the eating problems.  How tall are you and your husband?
     I think that you want to feed her a lot of good small healthy snacks - all day long.  If she is not allowed to snack then by regular food time she could be starving and thus eats way too much.  Also exercise is important.  Start checking out basketball, etc.  It looks like she may be over 6 feet tall by the time she is done growing!

[Sandman2]

   I had to guess at the specifics for her age - so definitely visit this site and do it correctly.  http://apps.nccd.cdc.gov/dnpabmi/
  But picking a birthdate of around Feb 2003 your daughter had a BMI rating at the 98%which is very obese.  Of course, if she was born earlier the rating would be less, but never the less - she is very overweight.  I can understand your concern.
   I would start first with a complete physical with a good blood workup to make sure that there is no physical reason for this problem.  Then Annies suggestion would be the next step.
   However! she is also off the charts for her height.  If she is growing like crazy - and she is as I said over the 97% for height then this could be a big factor in her need for food.  You really need to sit down with her doctor and find out what is going on. Her height really does change the factors.

[AnnieBrooke]

It sounds like food is a big flashpoint, emotionally.  I'd see if she is willing to talk to a counselor who specializes in this kind of issue, and then you and your husband go later for a few sessions to understand what the counselor thinks is going on.