It could be due to his intelligence. He has quickly learned through trial and error how to get his way. Or, I suppose he could have something like ADHD.
There are two good discipline books I usually recommend. The first is
"SOS Help for Parents," by Lynn Clark. It describes how to correctly use the timeout system. That system when used correctly will work.
"Love and logic" by fay and cline seems to work well with smart kids as it uses a system based on what they are doing. I think they have a book out for younger kids.
Hi there. Whew, definitely nip this in the bud. MANY kids are super smart. But they ALL have to adhere to the same rules and regulations of the world as everyone else. :>) As you know.
What kinds of punishments are they doing at school? That is where discipline for school events should occur. It's hard because we as parents want to step in but for that age, discipline needs to be immediate. Time outs, lack of privileges, visits with the school counselor and principal.
At home, be very mindful that you do not allow him to be 'the boss'. YOU choose what movie is being watched, what game is being played. You make sure he doesn't always win the game. Make sure he has to share his prized possessions. Make him earn his favorite things with good behavior. Reward him and give positive reinforcement for good choices.
I have used love and logic with my kids and our school system endorses it. I find it very effective--- consequences are the teacher rather than you being angry.
But, what is the school doing when these episodes happen? One thing you can start doing is talking to your son about his peers. Point out to him that he is disrupting others so they can't learn (which he is). That kids will get angry and not want to play with him (which they will). That he needs to be a good friend to the other kids and not take away their school time by his actions which disrupt the class. This will impact his friendships as he'll be the kid that other kids knows gets in trouble. Then parents know because kids talk or they observe and it affects his reputation and how he is perceived, this means he won't be invited over or to a birthday party, etc. Talk to him about that. Some kids find this motivating for self control.
If you notice self control issues often, do look into add/adhd or sensory. good luck
Very good points by Specialmom. One thing I should have mentioned is the school needs to handle things done at school and you need to handle things done at home. In other words, don't punish him for things done at school. It just doesn't work at this age. However, teaching him how to react at school as Specialmom said is important.
You might also look into a series of books aimed at this age group. Its called the best behavior series and includes titles like "Know and follow Rules," "Listen and Learn", "Share and take turns." Info can be found here - http://www.amazon.com/Follow-Rules-Cheri-Meiners-M-Ed/dp/1575421305/ref=pd_sim_14_5?ie=UTF8&dpID=61HJUw9wxKL&dpSrc=sims&preST=_AC_UL160_SR160%2C160_&refRID=0P352PVS7QSJ6VR7HNN7