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What do i do about my 4yr old daughter being mean to her younger sister?

Hi, I have a 4 yr old daughter named mariah and a 15 month old daughter named aleena and mariah is constantly pushing aleena around mariah hits her yells at her and does not want to share toys with her when i see this i try to redirect aleena and give her another toy but they always want what the other has and mariah fights cuase she is bigger and knows she can take it away they can hardly ever be alone and not fight what do i do?
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Avatar universal
I agree with 91004 - great advice. Really helped with my two boys.
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Avatar universal
My kids are 2 and 4, i think it is normal for kids to fight over toys with mine I tell them to share whoever got the toy first can play with it for awhile then after 5 minutes trade off it works with mine and now my oldest will say lets share it. If they dont want to share it then I put it up they normally get along and cooperate when this happens
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535822 tn?1443976780
No doubt there are some good books out there ,and the tips are worth trying I have much help reading up and also on the internet, I havent read Siblings without Rivalry but I will, my daughters are now grown up and we still have a lot of Rivalry, usually with me in the middle , but hey, thats another story Good luck
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13167 tn?1327194124
I agree with Margy,  that Mariah is jealous of the new attention Aleena is getting and it's causing her to act out.

You might want to read "Siblings without Rivalry".  They would tell you to give Mariah NO ATTENTION AT ALL in the fights.  Just simply pick up Aleena,  give her loving and kisses and attention for being attacked,  and don't even give a glance at Mariah.  Not even a disapproving glance.  As if Aleena had fallen down a stairwell and gotten injured,  you wouldn't chastise the stairwell.  

Only give Mariah positive attention at other times when things are going well, or she is alone,  etc.  Never ever give her  negative attention for injuring Aleena.  Ignore her completely and only fawn over Aleena when she is hurt by her sister.

When they are playing well together,  give each a lot of attention.

You might want to get the book.  I think there is a lot of wisdom in it.
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Avatar universal
thank you so much for your advice and i really thought about what you think but mariah gets alot of attention we are currently staying with my mother in-law so mariah gets attention by her father myself her grandma and her auntie and also when mariah is doing any activies she seems to not want aleena around at all we also take mariah toalot of places like the park or the zoo so she gets alot of what she wants do have any more advice on what to do?
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535822 tn?1443976780
mariah is jealous of aleena , maybe aleena as she is younger gets the attention that she , mariah used to get...you supervise at all times , and you make sure that mariah is getting as much positive attention as she did before aleena was born. Make sure that her Dad is involved and plenty of games and Physical activities, you can seperate them at times and give Mariah more positive attention, focus on that and do special things with her.
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