I don't make it a habit to get involved in others buisness, but I feel compelled to speak up in defense of this mother.
Shame on you ehoberg. I would hope that you would never have to experience what it is to care for a special needs child. I for one know that you would not be able to manage. Perhaps you would possibly do more psycological harm than good.
"What did we do before psychopharmacology? I know, we parented."
As the mother of an incredible 8 year old autistic I have gone to great lengths working to secure the proper services for the last year for my son. I am not a perfect parent by any means, next to the Virgin Mary, and maybe June Cleaver, I don't think you would ever find one. My son would not be where he is today (fully mainstreamed) if it wasn't for my patience, acceptance, and love. He also would most certainly not be where he is today if it weren't for the medications that help control his symptoms. No, I don't relish the thought that my child needs to be medicated, but this was a choice his father and I made to help ease the distress he encounters on a daily basis. Was it your choice? No.
"The advent of ADD or ADHD is corollary with the advent of the practice of sticking our kids in day care. In 1986, there were only about 600 known cases in the US of either of these disorders, and when Ritalin started sponsoring the research into this disorder, what do you know, tens of thousands of diagnoses sprouted up. Sounds like a conflict of interest."
Wow, such satire. It is erroneous opinions such as yours that continue to feed the discrimination many of these precious children are forced to endure. How fortunate my son is, for he lacks the ability to read between the lines (what often times is referred to as "social cues" or "non-verbal communication"). Thus, he is protected from such degradation. Perhaps this IS something you may be familiar with since you felt it necessary to blatantly disrespect JessicaJ by confusing her 10 year old son with a what(?), a"hormonal?" 4 year old as you did in your statement
"4 year olds experience a flux of hormones not unlike puberty, not unlike menopause. It makes them moody and cranky. I will bet that's all it was."
"If a kid is not truly ADD or ADHD and we put him on drugs, those drugs can make him more hostile and psychotic. Zoloft is a nasty drug."
Are you an MD? A pharmacist by chance? Zoloft as an SSRI* will not effect each patient the same, what works for one, may not work for another.
*SSRI is an abbreviation for selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor, the designation for a class of antidepressants that work by increasing levels of serotonin in the brain.
While your personal opinion of Zoloft is just that, YOUR OPINION. Zoloft, in MY OPINION has and continues to be an essential part of my son's ability to actually want to go outside and play in the sunshine instead of crouched in a corner of the kitchen crying because he is terrified of a ladybug or a harmless fly. (and I don't mean scared in the ways of a hormonal 4 year old. And don't question me on this,I know because I have a 4 year old as well and she has never exhibited fear such as my son) of a ladybug or a harmless fly. Have you yourself ever experienced an anxiety attack? Pretty scary.
"Zoloft is a nasty drug and if this child isn't mellowed out by what would send you or me through the roof, guess what, he probably isn't properly diagnosed."
Hmmmm. If I'm not mistaken, her son is taking 25mg 1 x a day right?
25mg is the standard initial dose. The maximum dosage is 200mg. I would perhaps check your resources. No where in the monograph or patient information sheet could I find "mellowed out" as an indication for use, nor could I find "send through the roof" in the side effects listed. And as far as your,
"guess what, he probably isn't properly diagnosed"
Would you say that to the mother of a child with diabetes? Muscular Dystrophy? Cerebral Palsey? Cystic Fibrosis? Cancer? BiPolar Disorder? Schizophrenia? Or how about the mother or father or even the grandparents who may have recently lost a child or grandchild to an illness? How about the mother of a beautiful Down Syndrome child?
"Further, there is a difference between having this disorder and having a lot on one's mind. What was going on in the kid's life when he was diagnosed? Were you changing jobs, homes, partners? 4 year olds experience a flux of hormones not unlike puberty, not unlike menopause. It makes them moody and cranky. I will bet that's all it was"
Tell me again why ADD or ADHD is the fault of a parent? While I do agree that external enviornmental issues can play (to a degree) a part of a childs functional behavior. Have you ever cared for a child or an adult with Fetal Alcohol Syndrome?or perhaps ...oh gosh, I don't know maybe Sensory Dysfunction Disorder might be an issue. Ever had a scratchy tag on the back of your shirt bother you so bad that you had to cut it off to finally get relief? What if no matter what you did you could find no relief. Or been in a room where the normal flouresent lights were so bright that you couldn't see anything? Or worse yet, maybe your ears are sooooooo hypersensitive that the little hum from those same flouresent lights (that a person with typical hearing couldn't hear if they tried really hard) botherd you so much that you could no longer hear what a teacher or a co-worker, or a mom or dad were saying to you?
Oh yea...you are correct, there is a difference between having ADHD and just having a lot on one's mind. When you have ADHD, you never get a break, you have the typical day to day "lot on your mind" stuff....then multiply that by 40 (ok...well maybe 30). Try to keep that organized in your head. Those individuals who have been through 3 hours of rigourus educational testing....oops oh rats, I can't remember what I was saying....perhaps I was distracted by another fleeting thought and blam it's gone. Anyone who truly has been given this diagnosis, child or adult doesn't want it believe me. Don't believe me? Why don't you call your local CHADD chapter and ask whomever answers the phone. While you're at it see if they can't send you some information on the three types of ADHD that are diagnosed, oh yea almost forgot... It really is interesting when you do the research and you learn instead of judging. Knowledge is power, just ask any mother of a special needs child. Did you know that boys and girls manifest the symptoms of ADHD differently?
"I had a friend who was married to a family doctor. The doctor left her with three children and major stressers. The doctor left his family essentially for another woman. The kids acted out. The dad beat them. The mother beat them, to break their spirited ways (they were religious). And then they stuck the oldest on ADD meds, KNOWING he wasn't ADD because they didn't want to deal with him. Well, he started acting psychotic, starting fires and hitting back. They basically wrote the kid off as mentally ill."
And the physician who actually "stuck" oh, I mean prescribed a federally controlled Schedual II medication, what is his name? And the Department of Health & Humanities (DHS) was... where again? And just why was it that they didn't want to "deal with him?" OK...I am trying to get this straight, it was YOUR friend that beat her children and you did nothing? Wow.
"Get your kid off medication. Get involved in his life. But make sure first you witness the detox of the nasty drug you put him on and become a responsible parent. Kids aren't perfect. And in dealing with life's little imperfections that we mature. We grow up. If we learn that if life isn't perfect we pop a pill...hmm."
Why don't you go and get a book? A little education wouldn't hurt you a bit. And when you're finished, why do you go to your local elementary school and volunteer to read a story to a class of kidergartners or help a 2nd grader who has difficulty keeping his letters or numbers from switching around when he or she is reading or tyring to do math.
There was a time in my life when (albeit a short amount of time) I may have shared some of your same views. I never dreamed that I would one day have a son with Autism/ ADHD/Anxiety Disorder/Sensory Dysfuntionial Disorder. But I wouldn't change a thing about him, he is why I am responding to this post. For as socially challenged as my 8 year old son is, he would never, ever be as disrespectful to anyone as you were to JessicaJ. Shame on you!
And to JessicaJ,
{{{HUG}}} good luck and I hope you are finding what you need for your son.
Jodi
Sailor, I think you are funny/awesome...however I disagree with you. She wasn't being hateful...she was just trying to point out examples of his behavior. Obv. she loves him or she wouldn't have the patient to even be around him at all...not to mention she is the one babysitting him...
Also, speaking from exp. ADD/ADHD is a real disorder. I know I have it. I got diagnosed with it when I was 18 ( and no I wasn't just trying to seak out ritalin or something like that...before someone says it). I went to the dr. not even knowing the symptoms of ADD...I was just tired of my head feeling like it was in a constant fogg, always losing things, always forgeting everything, never being able to concentrate, ect. 7 yrs later I am still on meds for it and wish my mom would of took me when I was little. Would of made not only school easier but mine and her life as well. I am not saying maybe some parents do use it as a cope out, however not everyone does. So maybe people deserve the benifit of the doubt when posting questions about there kid.
wow that was the most non understanding remark i have ever hear. no emotions of an aunt at all. myself as an aunt would have love and consideration and patience. you exhibit none of these. maybe your poor sis should get another sitter since this child is nothing but a pain in your side.
Well I believe ADHD is a real thing. My 6 year old nephew is so completely hyper active he does the same thing.He talks constantly about nothing in particular. If no one is listening,he talks to himself.He talks just to talk. If you take him to a store he is a mess and running and yelling and grabbing stuff of the shelves (acceptable for a 3 year old not a almost 7 year old)
He cant do his homework.He doesnt concentrate or really even try to.So,he is doing badly in school now.
He doesnt pick up after himself (I hate having him at my house because he destroys it in a matter of monents)
My sister wants to live life in denial though,there is nothing wrong with her son.Meanwhile everyone else has to suffer with the child's very annoying behavior. (exspecially me because I get stuck babysitting all the time)
I appauled you for attempting to get your son's behavior problems under control. At least you are trying.
Anyone who thinks ADHD isnt real should spend a few hours with a kid who is...you will change your mind!
I fully agree with the above posting. why does ADHD seem to be more or less confined to the western world? where was it thirty years ago? it is all to simple to blame a difficult behaviour that people either dont know how to deal with or more commonly wont deal with on ADHD. I am not saying that some kids dont have some mental problems but ADHD is being more and more used for an excuse to behave badly. Parenting is an extremely difficult job and a job for which there is no training.
What did we do before psychopharmacology? I know, we parented.
The advent of ADD or ADHD is corollary with the advent of the practice of sticking our kids in day care. In 1986, there were only about 600 known cases in the US of either of these disorders, and when Ritalin started sponsoring the research into this disorder, what do you know, tens of thousands of diagnoses sprouted up. Sounds like a conflict of interest.
If a kid is not truly ADD or ADHD and we put him on drugs, those drugs can make him more hostile and psychotic. Zoloft is a nasty drug. I repeat, Zoloft is a nasty drug and if this child isn't mellowed out by what would send you or me through the roof, guess what, he probably isn't properly diagnosed.
Further, there is a difference between having this disorder and having a lot on one's mind. What was going on in the kid's life when he was diagnosed? Were you changing jobs, homes, partners? 4 year olds experience a flux of hormones not unlike puberty, not unlike menopause. It makes them moody and cranky. I will bet that's all it was.
I had a friend who was married to a family doctor. The doctor left her with three children and major stressers. The doctor left his family essentially for another woman. The kids acted out. The dad beat them. The mother beat them, to break their spirited ways (they were religious). And then they stuck the oldest on ADD meds, KNOWING he wasn't ADD because they didn't want to deal with him. Well, he started acting psychotic, starting fires and hitting back. They basically wrote the kid off as mentally ill.
Get your kid off medication. Get involved in his life. But make sure first you witness the detox of the nasty drug you put him on and become a responsible parent. Kids aren't perfect. And in dealing with life's little imperfections that we mature. We grow up. If we learn that if life isn't perfect we pop a pill...hmm.
It is a good idea to re-evaluate his medication regimen. He has been on an unusual combination of medications, and the variety and doses of psychostimulant medications he has been on is quite out of the ordinary. The doctor you recently visited was setting you on a good course. It may be wise, even though the school year has begun, to discontinue all medications and begin anew. It's hard to say at this point what is helping and what is not. The behavior you are witnessing is likely not psychotic behavior, and it can be symptomatic of both anxiety and hyperactivity. If it is related to the reduction in Zoloft, it could result from increased anxiety. One issue that should be addressed is the presence of the tic disorder and if this is associated with the large dose of stimulant medication he has been taking. The goal of weaning him off the clonazepam is sound.