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are my 8 year old daughters thoughts normal
I have a very intellegent well behaved child. I have a very open relationship with her and she feels comfortable talking to me about anything. All of a sudden she has been having thoughts in her mind which are disturbing her. She says she thinks about men touching her and sucking her private parts and the thing that worries her the most is she says she enjoys it .(she defenitely hasnt been molested)She has also been having thoughts about strangling me and this makes her so upset because she thinks she is bad because she has these thoughts. I have told her that everyone has different thoughts and that because she doesnt act on her thoughts it is okay. Firstly is it normal for an 8 year old girl to have these thoughts. Secondly is there a way to stop her thinking this way or a way of making her feel better. She is starting to think she is not normal.
Let me tell u it feels good lickIng and sucking and suckIng breast! If our daughter already knows about that stuff take advantage and do it with her get her to do it with uget her to lick oir viginahave fun wt it!
When I was 10 I was involved in sex with my 7 year
Old niebor we would suck each others privates she was also a girl to tell u the truth I LOVED it! It felt great only leaving me to want to do it again.
Old niebor we would suck each others privates she was also a girl to tell u the truth I LOVED it! It felt great only leaving me to want to do it again.
I think that maybe I am in a situation like yours. My son is six years old, I am unsure of his thoughts. My son makes alot of references to his butt and his pennis. Recently he has been having
friends stay the night. One of the other mothers informed me that my son suggested playing naked school. He said that naked school was played by touching things with your butt and pennis. What do I do with this? I have a million thoughts going through my head. Any suggestions would be helpful.
friends stay the night. One of the other mothers informed me that my son suggested playing naked school. He said that naked school was played by touching things with your butt and pennis. What do I do with this? I have a million thoughts going through my head. Any suggestions would be helpful.
My daughter is extremely open with me and this is why she felt able to tell me about her thoughts. I have told her she has done nothing wrong and have further gently questioned her about possible molestation. she was quite shocked and assured me she hasnt. she is very intellegent and i have fully explained about inappropriate touching and it is never the childs fault. I am 100% sure its never happened to her. After speaking to my mother who is the only other person apart from me to baby sit her she thinks perhaps tv maybe part of the problem. I was unaware my mother watches The Bold and the Beautiful and my daughter would sit and play in the room when it was on. After talking to my daughter it appears she watched as well. I have never seen this before but after my mom told me I was shocked over the sexual contact.My daughter said on this show she has seen men taking womens clothing off and kissing their necks. When asked if she had seen other shows like this she said no.In regards to her thoughts on men sucking her breasts she said it reminds her of the people on bold and the beautiful.I feel very guilty over what she has seen and does anyone know what to do from now
Although at first thought, this is very disturbing, some of it can be explained by the fact that she did see the breastfeeding and her reaction to it. When my son was born, my four year old daughter picked up a doll of hers and put it under her shirt to "breast feed" the doll. So it could be as innocent as that. At the age of eight, if she had never seen breast feeding befor and not told about it ahead of time, it could be a little shocking. Don't jump to conclusions. Next time she talks about it, ask open ended questions in a way to gain additional information. It could also be that she saw a soap opera at a friends house. They can easily put thoughts like this into a child's mind.
One more thing...
Maybe you should sit down and have a heart to heart talk with her. If someone is molesting her, it is certain that he has "scared" her into silence...telling her that if she tells, that you will think she is a "bad girl" and that you will "hate her" and maybe even that you would "hurt her" because she is a "bad girl" (hence the hurtful thoughts toward you). You need to reassure her that you love her no matter what and if anyone ever does anything to her and says that it's a "secret" or that if she tells that she will be a "bad girl" or that no one will believe her anyway...that that person is a "bad person" and is telling her lies to protect himself and that she has to tell you. Reassure her that you would never think of her as "bad" or ever hurt her. And if she does tell that something has happened...as unbelievable as it might sound...believe her and hug her and tell her that you will do everything in your power to make sure that he never hurts her again.
P.S. When I was 13, I was in our barn looking for something when my uncle walked in, cornered me, touched my breast and tried to stick his tounge in my mouth. I was able to pull away and ran from the barn. I was in the barn for less than 10 min. I was scared to tell at first, but my mom could tell that something was wrong and convienced me to tell her what happened. I found out that my cousin and aunt had accussed him of inappropriate behavior in the past but no one believed them. They knew I had no reason to make this up and I knew nothing of his past. So they made sure I was never anywhere where he could catch me alone again. This was my uncle! And it happened in less than 10 mins!
Maybe you should sit down and have a heart to heart talk with her. If someone is molesting her, it is certain that he has "scared" her into silence...telling her that if she tells, that you will think she is a "bad girl" and that you will "hate her" and maybe even that you would "hurt her" because she is a "bad girl" (hence the hurtful thoughts toward you). You need to reassure her that you love her no matter what and if anyone ever does anything to her and says that it's a "secret" or that if she tells that she will be a "bad girl" or that no one will believe her anyway...that that person is a "bad person" and is telling her lies to protect himself and that she has to tell you. Reassure her that you would never think of her as "bad" or ever hurt her. And if she does tell that something has happened...as unbelievable as it might sound...believe her and hug her and tell her that you will do everything in your power to make sure that he never hurts her again.
P.S. When I was 13, I was in our barn looking for something when my uncle walked in, cornered me, touched my breast and tried to stick his tounge in my mouth. I was able to pull away and ran from the barn. I was in the barn for less than 10 min. I was scared to tell at first, but my mom could tell that something was wrong and convienced me to tell her what happened. I found out that my cousin and aunt had accussed him of inappropriate behavior in the past but no one believed them. They knew I had no reason to make this up and I knew nothing of his past. So they made sure I was never anywhere where he could catch me alone again. This was my uncle! And it happened in less than 10 mins!
I have a 7 yr old daughter and if she started talking about those type of sexual questions, I would be VERY concerned! I have a 1 yr old that she has seen me breastfeed and she doesn't get any ideas like that! I am no expert but, how can you be so sure that she hasn't been molested?? If she has been ANYWHERE (i.e. friend's house, relative's house) where she was out of your sight for even 10 minutes....she could have been molested. Also, I have heard that pedifiles will often show their potenial victims porno videos. If she hasn't been molested yet, someone may be thinking about it. I don't know if your married, but I have seen alot of reports about mother's boyfriends sexually molesting the daughters without the mother's knowledge.
I hope this is not the case for you, but if this is happening, it would explain the sexual interest and disturbing thoughts (children who have been molested often exibit behavioral changes).
If I were you I would be very careful and watchful about who she is allowed to visit. Better to be safe than sorry!
I hope this is not the case for you, but if this is happening, it would explain the sexual interest and disturbing thoughts (children who have been molested often exibit behavioral changes).
If I were you I would be very careful and watchful about who she is allowed to visit. Better to be safe than sorry!
Well what a relief........... mabey your quite as DISTURBED as I thought from your other postings...The t.v does give way to much info and visuals for children. I hope you moniter your t.v and of those in your home. No I have to go on my gut feeling, you are disturbed and should leave people alone.
Maybe she is just moving into puberty prematurely, it happens. On the other hand maybe she inadvertently saw pornography on the t.v and she has those images constantly on her mind.
No she hasnt seen an inapporopriate movie but when she for the first time saw my friend breast feed her baby she was very shocked and I wonder if this has affected her as she thinks of men sucking her breasts.Also recently she placed a doll against her vagina and I wonder if its possible she got the idea from this. She has never been told about oral sex and Im 100% certain she has never been molested.Anyone elses experiences or thoughts would be apprecitated.
Is it possible she was at a friends house and saw an inappropriate movie?
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
It depends on what you told her. The particular thought about men sucking her private parts is not the sort of thought that would normally occur to a child.
No family history of anxiety disorders. Is it possible for her to get sexual thoughts because I have taught her about sexual abuse and told her noone else is allowed to touch her private parts and this has made her think of it.
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
First of all, you did fine by way of your response to her. You were reassuring and calm, and both go a long way in situations like this. Regarding the content of her thoughts, it's hard to know what to make of them. I would question her a bit re: the sexualized thoughts, with a view toward figuring out how it might have occurred to her to wonder about this. It may be that she is displaying the early signs of an obsessive-type Obessive Compulsive Disorder, but by no means is that obvious by the couple of behaviors you have described. Is there any family history of anxiety disorders on your side of the family or on her father's side of the family?
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