child anxiety

[DotingMOM]

My son is 7 years old. He is in gred 1 & have already spent half a year in school. Of lately, he has develope a fear of separation from either myself and his dad. He would keep asking the same question like when or how long then he finishes school and see us. He loves school but will create a scene when we send him off. We keep assuring him that we'll be there to fetch him and the school is safe. THere's no evidence that he was bully or teachers pick on him. Infact, he's popular among them before the semester break about 2 weeks ago (it began last week after the school reopens). I'm proud to say that he does well in school, his results were all A's.
He is our only son and we love him from day 1 when he was born. Both of us have flexible working hours, we spend alot of time together i.e. holidays, playing & sleeping as well. He is well rewarded with toys & treats. Generally, we can name ourselves no.1 PARENT. We spend time together and do most things together...no neglections, we listen, we share our happening & views...even we are patience to explain to him.
His changed behaviour is honestly worrying and fearsome to us. Though we keep reminding him we love him, be there when he finishes school, help with his work, be ther during breaks.. but still he continues to cry during classes & kept telling his teacher he misses us.
Please help.. what should we do?

[Natta1980]

Make sure that you are not....hmmm...too doting:)

I was, out of my own anxiety, and once I've learned to "let go" - things have improved tremendously.


But seriosly,

Since he is asking the same question as to when he will be picked up, whuy don't you try a visual schedule (he can help drawing) with sequence of events and their timing.....Or, if he is good in writing/reading, just get him a kiddie organizer......

Good luck:)

[DotingMOM]

Thanks for the advise. The dad has decided that we should be more patience, go back to normal routines, continue to talk and assure him of our commitment and love to him. I am praying hard that he can grow to be strong and brave whenever he's ready. Definately, we'll never give up on him.

[jdtm]

There is a difference between separation anxiety and separation anxiety disorder.  The latter is more severe, usually an inherited trait and not the result of life experiences, and a life-long issue.  I suspect your son suffers from separation anxiety disorder and/or generalized anxiety disorder.

I might suggest you google the phrase "separation anxiety disorder in children" or "anxiety disorders and children" or similar words/phrases to learn more about this condition.  If you feel this might be the issue, then contact your family doctor.  If he/she is unable to help you, then ask for a referral to a medical specialist with experience in anxiety disorders.  Anxiety is highly treatable in young children and quite common.

Anxiety affects one's mental, physical and emotional well-being - "just talking" won't solve all these issues (the reason you need to see a doctor).  There are many books and internet sites to help you to educate yourself about this issue.  I wish you the best ....