daughter hates me

[mommy101527]

I am a stay at home mom.  I do everything with my little girl.  I get her a pass along with myself to an amusement park every summer.  We do crafts together.  She is very well behaved.  She is very well mannered.  I put her in preschool this year and she was throwing some horrible fits for about the first five months.  She still looks very upset when i drop her off but is doing  much better.  She has become very close with her dad, which is good.  I like seeing them have fun.  He wanted them to be closer.  But she has withdrawn from me.  She tells me now that shes not sure she loves me anymore.  She says she would like to tell me she loves me but can't.  This really hurts me.  I love her more than anything.  Why would someone so young and innocent say something so hurtful.

[chigirl29]

Oh goodness, the five year old stage:((((((
Mine never was bad at two, but at five she was just--not loving the mommy.

She was a daddy's girl.

Now, at six, she adore's mommy and has been wearing mommy's old night gown for two days straight....

She will come around--they usually do.  

[mommy101527]

Thank you.  I really appreciate that someone was out there tonight to here what I had to say.  I had a really bad night with her and by the way she's five.  she turned five in december.  she is a good girl.  I think maybe i went wrong somewhere.  I do believe in discipline.  I also believe in a good hug and kiss.  thank you

[SL345]

How old is she? Your note was touching. Kids go through different states of attachments to different parents. It seems very normal and very healthy to me. It could be related to a lot of things. She may feel angry that you are the one who brings her to school and she has no power to control it. It may make her feel powerful, help her to separate and to be able to attach to others by pushing you a way a little. Try not to take it so personally - although as a parent I fully understand that that is more easily said that done. Kids can say things that cut you to the quick. It sounds like you two are very close and that she loves you a lot. Read Runaway Bunny to her - a story for preschoolers that tells of a bunny trying to separate from her mother and the mother follows her to show her love no matter what she does. You be the anchor in the stormy sea of her ups and down of closeness and separation. It sounds real normal to me and may actually be a sign of strength that she could pull away from you in this way. Hope that helpds.