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hyperactivity disorder

Hello, I am a mother of a very hyper and very smart 4 yo daughter.  She can perform many tasks without problem and does like doing crafts but also I can walk out of the room and she is painting the table or ruining something.  An example would be a brand new full shampoo bottle that she knows should not be dumped in the tub of bath water because she was punished several times for doing so but I leave the bathroom for one minute and the whole bottle is gone and then she says mommy I think the shampoo is empty.  I asked her why did she do it even though she knew mommy will punish her and her answer was but I wanted too.  Then when I go to spank or take her to her room she screams at the top of her lungs NO MOMMY, I LOVE YOU.  I don't like screaming and I notice that if I am not yelling she just ignores me.  She can also have the most adult conversation with you and you would think wow what a really smart child she can recall where she picked out her rug for her big girl room and in school she does well because I always ask the teacher who is a ten year veteran of teaching 4 yo's and so far she is doing well.  She has told me the smart ones like to manipulate the situation but I don't know why I can't get her to just settle down and stop being so distructive.
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189897 tn?1441130118
COMMUNITY LEADER
    Well, its always possible that she has ADHD.  Basically it means that besides being hyper, the younger child has no filters.  They will do something with out thinking.  As they grow older (middle school or higher), they are able to think twice.  I have seen many kids that literally don't realize they have done something because they acted on the impulse so fast, and then moved on to other things and that point in time was lost to them.
   What this means is that if it is true that she has ADHD, then the conventional means of discipline won't work.  Spanking her is a huge waste of time, and teaches her the wrong way to handle situations.  Get a book like, "The ADD/ ADhD Answer book." , by Susan Ashley and follow it.  The book will also help you decide if she has ADHD - although she could just be a very smart manipulative kid.  At that age, you probably won't get many doctors to diagnose her condition.  I would ask her teacher what she thinks.  She has been around kids long enough to have a good opinion.  If its not ADHD, then I would recommend getting, SOS Help for Parents by Lynn Clark.   Hope this helps.
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