my backwards child

[jo281]

my daughter is eleven and in the last few years it seems as she is acting younger and younger. her grades are good. a's and b's but she hates loud noise to where she covers her ears. and screams to turn it down. she doesnt really talk to anyone. she loves being around people but is so scared. plus at the moment i cant go to work because she cannot get away from me. if i change anything like have someone else pick her up from school. she gets upset and wants me never to do that agian. she has to have all the doors shut at night with her night light on with the tv or she will not go to sleep. plus she steals all the time food and candy. no matter how many times i tell her no and spank her. she is also a hoarder. she keeps everything. i can tell her to throw it away and i will go in her room to do my monthly clean out and i find it hiden. the doctors have diagnosed her with adhd and it just doesnt seem right. my other children are excelling her. i just feel like there is something else going on.

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

There is certainly more to the picture than ADHD (if indeed that diagnosis is accurate). She is displaying signs of emotional disturbance, generally under the umbrella of anxiety disorder. This invites treatment. From a parenting point of view, it is important that you stop deferring to her upset about your absence. By deferring to it, you are actually supporting her view that your presence is absolutely necessary. In other words, you are making the problem worse. Use of physical punishment, as you have learned, is not helpful and I would recommend ceasing it. Instead, adopt the tactics in Lynn Clark's book SOS Help for Parents (see www.sosprograms.com).

[jo281]

sorry lazy eye

[jo281]

also in her younger pictures her eyes would do this lay look. in all of them. but if you look at her regular you dont see it.