sibling sex exploration/play

[rlzk]

Is this within the "normal" range of child sex curiosity?  The boy is 7 1/2; his sister is 5.  He has his own digital camera.  He took pictures of his sister's private parts apparently up close and his mother found the pix on his camera.  

  She and I have known each other for 6 years, (she thinks we're good friends) but she did not tell me about this.  She told another neighbor who she does not know very well?!!. The neighbor told me and we are creeped out about it.  My 3 children, girls 7 and 4, play with the girl and sometimes boy mainly at my house.  There have been SO MANY OTHER DISCIPLINE ISSUES with this boy, (not sexual that I am aware of) since we have known them that my girls choose not to play with him.  HE HAS/KNOWS VERY FEW LIMITS ie his parents/grandparents exhibit no authority with him.  Incidentally, he pulled down my 7 year olds bathing' suit bottom at the pool this past summer.

There have been personality changes recently in the sister, clingy  and manipulative with her mother, manipulative in play with my daughter. These could be related to a new baby in the house (6 months) and adjustment to kindergarten.

Another friend thinks I may have an obligation to "report" this. I am reluctant (more so the neighbor who got the first hand info) to "sic" social services on this family or get "involved" unless necessary to get help for the children.  The mother has had the boy in therapy before. (She is always looking for a quick fix without much consideration of their family dynamics/parenting.

[rlzk]

Thank you for taking the time to answer my question.  Based on your advice, I contacted the guidance counselor at our school, who is familiar with this family and they will handle appropriately.

[OneofHisflock]

Also, I want to add it is not advisable to allow your children to play unsupervised with the little girl anymore. Abused children usually repeat the abuse with others with sexualized play. So, if they play together, it needs to be under a watchful eye.  

And again,I implore that you expediently report this to the local authorities not only for the welfare of the two children involved but also for the welfare of any children they may come into contact with.

[OneofHisflock]

This is very suspect and definitely needs to reported for both the siblings involved and for the welfare of any of their playmates, current and future.

A child this young should not have any idea about taking pornographic pictures. It sounds as if the boy has been sexualized (introduced to sex). Therefore, it is a good chance that this child has been sexually abused himself.

Mental health professionals can ascertain if there has been abuse, usually by play therapy.

Basically, if not reported, the little boy may be continue to be abused and also he may continue his pattern of abuse with the little sister and probably with other playmates.

The young boy and the little sister need counseling as sexual abuse will lead to major psychological problems in adulthood as well as the fact that the cycle of abuse will continue without intervention.

PLEASE report this as soon as possible for the children's sake!

[OneofHisflock]

Sorry, just reread your post. Of course, any playtme with your children where the little boy is involved needs to be in your direct presence. Sexualized children usually seem to be obssessed with sexual play and will attempt it if the circumstances are favorable (younger, vulnerable playmates or compliant peers and private surroundings).

I am not recommending that these children be ostracized, just that any play with them be VERY supervised so as to avoid trauma to other children.

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

No, this behavior is not at all to be expected of a child of seven and it is a cause for serious worry. It would be sensible for those of you who are friends of the mother to talk about the matter with her, since she broached it already. It would not be unreasonable to report to the social services personnel, and this can be done in an anonymous fashion (though of course it would be pretty obvious where the report originated). While it might be difficult, the best course would be to speak directly with the mother and tell her of your intention to report the matter. Before you do, you can confer with social services personnel and recieve their advice about the situation.