This probably gives you a moment of infuriation as a parent. Does it work, does he derail you? I think I'd calmly say after the fact when he is NOT In trouble that you need to set a rule that he make eye contact and listen when he has warranted scolding. That you will sit quietly when he does that and as soon as he stops, you begin again. And if he starts you stop and wait again. And every minute it takes is one less minute of an activity that he likes. And then if he gives you eye contact or attention during a scolding moment, praise him!
Things kids do perpetuate usually because it works. He gets you off your parenting game with these antics. I wouldn't raise your voice or anything like that but he needs to now that you are the parent and WILL come out as the one who is doing their JOB in parenting them. Does that make sense?
I did have someone tell me this though once when my kids were little. The old pick your battles thing. Envision three buckets. Bucket A is the non negotiables . . . you absolutely can't do. Things like run out in traffic, take your clothes off in the grocery store, etc. There should be very few things in bucket A. Bucket B is for the things that you'd like such as don't yell at your sibling, Pick up your toys. Things that are important and you'd like to engrain. there are more things in Bucket B than A. And bucket C is for the things you can let go. If it isn't done your way. Or they are a little loud when excited. or they are running in the house. Things that maybe bug you but are not major infractions. Bucket C should have a few in there and these are the things you pick your battles or distract them to change. Basically choosing what you'll make a federal case out of and what you won't.
What grade is your son in?
Not sure I have seen a parenting book that says to change a child's behavior you should make him look at you while you are scolding him. Seems like torture to me. Scolding is punishment on top of punishment. You know what he did wrong....you don't have to ask him. You do need to make eye contact when giving directions. But when he has been caught doing something wrong. Tell him what he did and put him in a timeout (appropriate for his age). When the timeout ends, you can talk with him about better choices. Remember your object is to change his behavior.
What does bother me a bit is it sounds like he has been punished often enough that he is developing defense mechanisms. It is possible that he cannot help making some of the mistakes he is making....like if he has ADHD. If so, the normal punishments will not work.
Finally, is he having the same problems in school? If so, there may be more going on here then just him being a bad boy at home.
Hello, I hope you come back and tell us how this is going!! Parenting is hard and we're here to support you and each other.