Hi Lani -
Wow - what a path you all have been on.
No, you can't get chlamydia any other way than sex, and I'm sorry to say that he wouldn't have had it for 14 years (before marriage to year 15 when you all were diagnosed). You both would have had symptoms long long before that. The longest I've seen is 2 years, and Dr. Hook, one of our doctors in our expert forum, says 4, I think.
Chlamydia might have caused the scar tissue, but kidney stones sure could, too. I think his decision to not get that procedure done was a mistake in judgment, but there isn't too much you can do now, right? He is also making big mistakes in not finishing the antibiotics, and his doctor should be made aware of that. His doctor might need to change his treatment plan.
The toxins might affect his mental state - I'm not entirely sure about that, but his doctor also needs to know that. I'm sure you want to help him, and I don't know if your husband has signed a release to allow your doctor to talk with you, but his doctor can just listen as you let him know what is going on.
I don't know what he is doing and saying that he didn't do before, but even if his mental state is being affected by toxins, I hope you know that you don't have to tolerate any abuse from him. Abuse is abuse whether its being caused by a physical, emotional or mental health problem. Please call 1-800-799-SAFE or go to http://www.ndvh.org/ I mean no offense or insults, and don't know what he is doing, but I wanted to say that just in case. Your safety is your number one thing here.
Thank you so much for writing me regarding my situation. I will go to the web-site and call as you have answered a lot more than you know. He left me for another woman and won't speak to me. He filed for a divorce and California is a no fault state. I will go get the help I need for the mental abuse I have undergone and continue to go through do to all of the lies he continues to spread! I thank you from the bottom of my heart!!
I'm so sorry for all you have gone through, and wish you the best of luck as you go forward. Let me know if you have any other questions.