Anxiety??

[amandajo389]

I am not sure if I am posting in the right place or not but here it goes..
I have really big issues with fear that someone or something is going to hurt my children... I know that EVERYONE has these fears but mine don't seem normal.. It is so bad that I sometimes make it hard for my kids to just live and be kids.. I cant ride in the car without looking back every few seconds to make sure there hands are not on the door handle because I am scared they will fall out the car.. I cant take them fishing on piers because I am scared they will fall in the water and I somehow wont be able to find them in the water.. The stress it brings be from being afraid they will drown is just to much to handle..
I dont like to let them walk without holding my hand in public..
Its scary because I can see them dying in my mind.. And it just scared the HELL out of me.. And I cant get the fear out of my head.. I cant sleep at night because I am scared someone will kidnap my daughter.. I have my 2 month old sleep with my cause I am scared he will stop breathing or die from SIDS.. Same with my daughter when she was a baby..

I have anger issues.. I get really mad really quick over stupid things..
I all of a sudden have issues with jelousy..
All these things are messing up my family.. I want to find out what is going on.. What do you think? Where should I go from here? I am lost..All I know is life is miserable this way

[Jaquta]

Definitely pursue therapy, it will be well worth it.

I think some of your fears are understandable (my younger sister fell out of the car when she was much younger and significantly damaged some of her teeth -from memory mum was in a hurry and had forgotten too ?close the door properly, not sure).
I would recommend you kiddy lock your doors.  Most cars have this option where they can't be opened from the inside.  Watch the windows though.  Better still educate your children about the dangers -age appropriately of course.

The main reason for me writing this was to warn you of the dangers of sleeping with your child.  There was an article in our newspaper recently about the increased number of infant deaths in our community due to parents placing them in their beds with them.  Many of these infants were smothered or asphyxiated.  It is much safer to have the child sleep alone in a cot.  There are things you can do to protect your child.  Usually there are organizations that provide support and information.

Please don't stress too much.  In my opinion over-protection can be as damaging as not protecting.  There needs to be a balance.

Is there a family member (a husband, etc) or friend who you would feel comfortable opening up too?  It could help in the interim till you could access therapy.

The anger, etc could be from feeling stressed and overwhelmed.  It sounds like you may just need some time or space for yourself (without the stress or responsibility of your children).  Sometimes just another pair of eyes helps to take the pressure off without feeling you need to be so hypervigilant all the time.

Good luck with everything and please look into accessing support/ therapy.

J

[Ted A Grossbart, Ph.D.]

Sorry to hear about all the misery.  As you probably suspect you shouldn't just live with this.  Get yourself into therapy.  These are all very treatable problems.

tg