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Help figuring out pregnancy possibilities
I have had protected intercourse with a girl twice around the 3rd of May. She told me today, June 10, that she took a home pregnancy test that came back positive. She said her last period was mid April. She also said that she had protected intercourse with someone else 2 weeks ago. She did not tell me exactly when. I am wondering what the possibilities are that I was the one to impregnate her or if it was him. Any feedback will be helpful. Thank you.
COMMUNITY LEADER
It could be you, certainly. The sex you had in early May would be within a reasonable time after her period in mid-April. She had sex with someone else two weeks ago; that was late May, presumably she might have expected another period in mid-May if she had not been pregnant. However, some women's periods don't come on a regular schedule every month, so the fact that she didn't apparently have a period in May is not a guarantee you're the dad.
She should get an ultrasound as soon as possible, it would be a nice idea if you would go with her (and if she has to pay cash to get it, it would be gentlemanly of you to split the cost. The time window for finding out from an ultrasound is limited, do it now, or you'll have to wonder for the whole pregnancy.). While there, ask the doctor for an estimated due date that is not just computed forward from her last period, but is based only on the baby's size and developmental markers shown in the ultrasound. (In fact, it's a good idea for her to tell the nurse in the first place that she does not remember when her last period was, so to not prejudice the data the ultrasound gives.) Once the doctor gives an estimated due date from an ultrasound, go home and either count backwards on a calendar 266 days, or else use an online conception calculator. It will give you an estimated conception date.
Keep in mind a few things.
- Doctors begin the gestational-age count, or the "weeks pregnant," on the first day of the woman's last period, or on a calculated first day if she does not remember when it was or has irregular cycles. This does NOT mean the woman got pregnant on the first day of her period, it just means doctors use that day to begin the count. If she has a regular cycle with a period every 28 days like clockwork, she would be likely to conceive about 14 days after the first day of her last period. So if the doc says to her "You're 8 weeks along," or "You're 8 weeks pregnant," he does not mean she conceived 8 weeks ago but more like 6 weeks ago.
- Don't settle for "You're x weeks pregnant," ask specifically for a due date from the ultrasound. Using that you can count backwards to reach an estimated conception date, it is much less confusing than fooling around with trying to figure out what the doc meant when he said weeks pregnant.
- For an ultrasound to be helpful to try to work the dates out, she needs it now. As time goes by they get less precise for this purpose, since babies grow at different rates. By the time she is out of her first trimester there is a wide margin for error in using an ultrasound to try to figure this out. So urge her to do this now, and for this reason you should offer to pay. Knowing now is much better than stressing for 9 months.
She should get an ultrasound as soon as possible, it would be a nice idea if you would go with her (and if she has to pay cash to get it, it would be gentlemanly of you to split the cost. The time window for finding out from an ultrasound is limited, do it now, or you'll have to wonder for the whole pregnancy.). While there, ask the doctor for an estimated due date that is not just computed forward from her last period, but is based only on the baby's size and developmental markers shown in the ultrasound. (In fact, it's a good idea for her to tell the nurse in the first place that she does not remember when her last period was, so to not prejudice the data the ultrasound gives.) Once the doctor gives an estimated due date from an ultrasound, go home and either count backwards on a calendar 266 days, or else use an online conception calculator. It will give you an estimated conception date.
Keep in mind a few things.
- Doctors begin the gestational-age count, or the "weeks pregnant," on the first day of the woman's last period, or on a calculated first day if she does not remember when it was or has irregular cycles. This does NOT mean the woman got pregnant on the first day of her period, it just means doctors use that day to begin the count. If she has a regular cycle with a period every 28 days like clockwork, she would be likely to conceive about 14 days after the first day of her last period. So if the doc says to her "You're 8 weeks along," or "You're 8 weeks pregnant," he does not mean she conceived 8 weeks ago but more like 6 weeks ago.
- Don't settle for "You're x weeks pregnant," ask specifically for a due date from the ultrasound. Using that you can count backwards to reach an estimated conception date, it is much less confusing than fooling around with trying to figure out what the doc meant when he said weeks pregnant.
- For an ultrasound to be helpful to try to work the dates out, she needs it now. As time goes by they get less precise for this purpose, since babies grow at different rates. By the time she is out of her first trimester there is a wide margin for error in using an ultrasound to try to figure this out. So urge her to do this now, and for this reason you should offer to pay. Knowing now is much better than stressing for 9 months.
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