Paternity Question

[Sunflower2018]

Can somebody help me? I had sex with somebody on November 12th in the afternoon. (A BIG MISTAKE). I was drunk and honestly i feel like he took a adavantage of me. I never had sex with anybody but my boyfriend of 4 years now. We haven’t used condoms for 2 years . My LMP Was December 5,2017, or could it have been implantation bleeding?? I don’t remember how light or heavy my cycle was. Jan. 8th. I went to the hospital and they couldn’t see anything but a yolk sac. And they told me they couldn’t determine gestational age. They told me to schedule a appointment for 8 weeks from my LMP which was. i took a ultrasound at Jan. 30th they said the baby measured 8 weeks and 3 days. Which puts my due date at September 8th.  I went to the hospital at 14 weeks  and 5 days. I went to hospital and they said my due date was September 2nd. I went to the doctor for my 20 week appointment check up but went at 19 weeks and 2 days. My baby measured exactly at 19 weeks and 2 days. Still due date Sept. 8th.  Is there any chance at all that the encounter on November 12th have anything with this pregnancy. I been worrying myself sick. I’m just afraid. I been looking so much up about implantation bleeding and implanting late. It really had me thinking a lot...

[AnnieBrooke]

I also see you went to the DDC and got a test. Did it show your boyfriend is the dad? If so, it confirms all the medical evidence. It might be useful to see a therapist to process the feelings you have about the other sexual event, because that is what seems to be driving your unwillingness to accept the medical results.

[Sunflower2018]

Yes. It showed my boyfriend as the father. Exactly what i wanted. I just want to make sure that they are accurate. My doctor set me a appointment for the therapist. So I’m hoping that it works. I’m such a over thinker and prone to stress and I really need help. So I’m going to take this help.

[AnnieBrooke]

"I just want to make sure they are accurate." I don't think anything anyone says on this website or even to you in person is going to give you certainty. You have to process the source of your worries, which believe me is not the dates, or the (fake) question of paternity.

[AnnieBrooke]

It sounds like you are so focused on being worried sick about what a big mistake it was and how you were drunk and how he took advantage and all, that you are not thinking.

If your baby came from sex on November 12, what due date would the doctor have given you once he or she looked at the baby by ultrasound?

[Sunflower2018]

August 8th ish. But ultrasounds are not 100% accurate right ? I’m just such over thinker. :(

[Sunflower2018]

Is there a such thing as implanting late ?

[Sunflower2018]

I been so worried because me and my boyfriend have been having sex for 2 years and when this happened it got me really thinking so hard. I hate it

[AnnieBrooke]

As you said, August 8. Or, to be most correct, probably August 6-12. Has any dotor, or any ultrasound, indicated any such thing? Why don't you look at two ultrasounds online, one of a baby in its 8th week and one of a baby in its 12th week, and see if there is a clear enough difference that even you, without any medical training, can see it? (hint: there is.) It might make you feel better.

But, you say, all doctors who have trained for years and read ultrasounds for years are probably wrong by a whole month, because you have evidence written on the Internet by freaked-out pregnant girls who know zip about medicine.

Sunflower, women write in on this forum all the time with dates that cannot possibly suggest they are pregnant by the wrong guy. Yet they are freaked out anyway. They are not really worried in their hearts about the dates, they are worried about what they did, having sex with the wrong guy in the circumstances that make them feel ashamed.  That makes them feel so bad about themselves that their mind floats the anxiety onto something easier, a straw-man worry that is easier to knock down. The problem is that no amount of reassurance about the fake worry takes away their anxiety, because it isn't really what they are worried about. They are usually worried about something they cannot change that they don't like about themselves, as revealed by what they did. You are going to have to just process that worry for what it is. Your concerns about the dates are a straw man, your concern about how you behaved is real. Work on that, decide what you are going to do to never have it happen again, process whether or not you intend to challenge the other guy on his behavior, and your worry about the dates will fade.