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Avatar universal

Who is most likely the father???

I made a huge mistake it was not intentional only if I just said NO. (I would never do this again) Please no judging. Still learning my lesson every day as my conscience eats me alive. I had sex with my bf on May 1st, 2nd and and 4th. I then had sex on may 7th (day of ovulation) with my ex around 4a.m. he say he pulled out but I don't believe him. I really want baby to be for my bf I want nothing to do with my ex.  I really want to know what are my chances. I am terrified and need a peace of mind. please help.
4 Responses
134578 tn?1517087675
COMMUNITY LEADER
Hi, jodjcam, this is not enough information to be able to tell you what you want to know.

How do you know May 7 is the day of ovulation? (Were you being treated by a doctor and he was looking every day with an ultrasound and saw the egg in the follicle one day and the empty follicle the next day? Were you taking ovulation test kits every day?)
5 Comments
Hello AnnieBrooke. I am very in tuned with my body and my cycles are very regular. My lmp was April 23-26 so I ovulated day 15 this is what my app said (that I've been using for a long time) how ever that is not the only source I used. However when I missed my cycle and got the positive on pregnancy test. Around 6 weeks I went to the dr because I had minor bleeding with pain from sex my bf and I had 2 days before. When they asked me when was my lmp I lied and said I did not know (God forgive me) so they could go off of baby growth instead. I crossed my fingers and hope that ovulation would be a couple days off so I'd know for sure it was for my bf but nope doc told me that baby was 6 weeks and 2 days! Putting my conception date at may 7th (just as the app said) and my due date will be Jan 28th 2018. I wanted to cry sooo hard because I knew what I had done. Been living with the guilt ever since (sorry about the essay)
So, when the doctor told you that you were 6 weeks 2 days, did the doctor tell  you that your conception date was May 7 and that your due date will be January 28? Or was some of that worked out by you?
Also, what was the date of the  ultrasound when the doctor told you that you were at 6 weeks 2 days, was the ultrasound on June 6?
Yes all this information was given by the doctor he told me my conception date was may 7th and he also stated that my due date is jan 28th. June 22nd was my first initial OB appointment. At that appointment if I can remember I was measured at 8wks and 4 days I begin a new week every Sunday. My due date has not changed, still (Sunday Jan 28th 2018) baby always measure on Q every appointment.
I do understand and know that just because you have sex on ovulation day does not mean that (sex on ovulation day) is what lead to pregnancy. It could be from sex days before. I'm praying and hoping that I am one Of the lucky ones. Or I hope that ovulation occurred in the wee hrs of the a.m. Like before 4 a.m. Which would've given my bf sperms change to make it there first :). I'm so worried. *sigh*
Avatar universal
Hello AnnieBrooke. I am very in tuned with my body and my cycles are very regular. My lmp was April 23-26 so I ovulated day 15 this is what my app said (that I've been using for a long time) how ever that is not the only source I used. However when I missed my cycle and got the positive on pregnancy test. Around 6 weeks I went to the dr because I had minor bleeding with pain from sex my bf and I had 2 days before. When they asked me when was my lmp I lied and said I did not know (God forgive me) so they could go off of baby growth instead. I crossed my fingers and hope that ovulation would be a couple days off so I'd know for sure it was for my bf but nope doc told me that baby was 6 weeks and 2 days! Putting my conception date at may 7th (just as the app said) and my due date will be Jan 28th 2018. I wanted to cry sooo hard because I knew what I had done. Been living with the guilt ever since (sorry about the essay)
Avatar universal
Does my boyfriend stand a better chance?
12 Comments
Is the baby a girl or a boy?

The baby is a girl
The baby is a girl
If you really ovulated on May 7 and the second appointment didn't just carry forward the figuring from the first appointment (that was not based on ultrasound evidence), should the baby have been a boy, your boyfriend would have stood a slightly lower chance. (Again, given you ovulated on May 7.) A girl doesn't mean the opposite (in other words, her being a girl doesn't necessarily give your boyfriend a higher chance), but at least it is not a discouraging sign, which it could have been if the baby was a boy. You could look up the Shettles method to see why. No guarantees, but at least no discouragement from hoping.

Have you considered doing a prenatal DNA test? They cost a boatload of money if done with a high-quality lab, but then you would know. If you do, test with both men, because one man's test result will confirm the other's, and use Ravgen or the DDC, not an Internet cheapie so-called "lab."
I have heard of the shuttles method. Just not aware of how accurate it is. I am definitely hoping and praying daily that this little baby if for my bf. My bf will be having a DNA test done after baby is born (no he doesn't know about the other guy) I CANT tell him about that encounter. That why this whole this is eating me alive. He just always said in the past that he will get a DNA test done just because of how crazy people can be (now look at me, one of the crazies) *sigh* and as far as getting DNA from my ex he seemed pretty sure it wasn't his and that I was overreacting we have not spoken since I found out. Just waiting one baby birth. I'm so stressed though.
Thank you for your help. I will Check out the shuttles method to keep my hopes up. I will keep you updated here. Have 8 more weeks (biting my nails).
I didn't say shuttles, I said Shettles. It's a guy's name.

It would be better if the other guy did test, but if you come out with a positive from your boyfriend you don't need to test with anyone else.

Use a lab that the courts would certify as appropriate for legally determining paternity, not a drugstore lab. That way you can be more sure of the result, and for child-support purposes you would need that anyway. Don't just get a kit at Walgreen's.
I meant shettles, sorry about that. And yes definitely NOO kit from Walgreens. Can't the lab nurse come to the hospital to swab on one of those days after birth? We don't have to go through court right?
Each state has different rules. Talk to a lawyer, the judge's clerk at the family courts, your doctor or the hospital for what the proper procedure is. Be sure to witness the guy doing the swab, so there is no doubt in your mind that he was the person who really did it.
Ok thank you so much for your help. Will keep you posted.
Keep in mind, you're the lucky one. (If you want to visit the depths of human misery, read the Infertility forum. Women who want a baby and can't get pregnant would trade places with you this very minute, knowing the dad's identity or not, married or not, poor, rich or in between.) You're going to be a mama and that makes you a winner.

Take care.
I know it has been a while I had a hard time logging into my account. Baby girl is 3 months old.. thanks be to God baby girl turned out to be for my boyfriend (guy A) I will never get myself in a situation like that ever again. It’s the worst feeling EVER. But I am beyond grateful  with the outcome. Thanks again for your help and encouragment be blessed :)
134578 tn?1517087675
COMMUNITY LEADER
That's great news! I assume you  did a DNA test and everything is confirmed?
1 Comments
YES ma’am! :)
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