Who is my baby's father????

[Purpleloverrrr]

I had my period March 16 all 7 days. I had unprotected sex with boyfriend on March 29 & due to an app i ovulated that day & i know i did. We broke up 2 weeks after that. I had my period April 14th all 7 days. Then i had unprotected sex with my ex from 2 years ago on April 29th & i guess i ovulated that day too but not sure. I missed my period May 14th & waited it out until i started my period but i didnt so i made an appointment but day before my appointment i had went to the ER due to really bad stomach pains that was June 16th ... they confirmed i was pregnant, did an ultrasound & the tech asked when was my last period & i told her April 14th so she was like so you should be about 9 weeks but she told me my hcg levels did not match my lmp ... Didnt get to ask if it was low or high. So i just waited till the doctor came in the room for the results & he said the baby was measuring 11weeks & 3days which is impossible. Can an early ultrasound be wrong? Is the baby measuring too big at that time i went to the ER? & who could be the father?

[AnnieBrooke]

Here is what I'd do. I would go to the next appointment, and explain that when you were at the E.R., they gave you a gestational age figure that doesn't make sense, and ask for another ultrasound that very day. By now it's going to be pretty late for precision, unfortunately, but it should be able to tell the difference between two guys a month apart with a period in between.

I assume you know that the gestational-age count (the figure in weeks) begins on the first day of your last period before getting pregnant? Because you had a pretty clear period after having sex with your ex, and because if the ER doc was implying the pregnancy is from before your last period (but if that was right, he should have told you that you were 13 weeks 1 day, which he didn't), in your shoes I would assume that the ER doc got the count wrong and you are pregnant from the second guy, after your last period. But do get the ultrasound, and see what results your doctor gives you. And write back. :)

[Purpleloverrrr]

Thank you very much for your help, i will update you on my next appointment on thursday!

[AnnieBrooke]

OK, please do. Basically, it's unlikely that the first guy is the dad, because you had a period. The doc gave you a weeks figure that is right between where it should be. For the first guy (unlikely though he is to be the dad), a GA count would have been around 13 weeks, and for the second guy, the doctor should have told you that you were around nine weeks, and he didn't do either thing. This makes me think the doc was not so swift at counting out weeks of gestation.

When you get your next ultrasound, don't let them count out anything based on when your last period came. In fact, if they didn't know the date of your last period it would probably be helpful, but since they do, ask them not to base any information they give you on the first day of your last period. (If you have to, tell them that your cycles are really irregular and ovulation can't be trusted to happen two weeks after your last period, so you don't want the figure used.) Don't let them pat you on the head with a "weeks pregnant" figure and send you home. Ask for the day the baby is due to be born, and for it to be based only on the ultrasound evidence of the baby's size and developmental markers. Then take that date home and put it into a conception calculator (easily found online) or just count back on a calendar 266 days from that date. If you are not too far along in your pregnancy, it should be pretty accurate at indicating when you got pregnant, and therefore which guy is the dad.

The problem with the gestational-age count (the "weeks pregnant") is that it begins on the first day of your last period, not actually when you conceived. And (especially if the woman has irregular cycles), this can be a source of great confusion because it might not accurately reflect when she really got pregnant. The count is done that way for historical reasons (before ultrasounds it was the only place to start a pregnancy count) but it has caused so many misunderstandings and griefs between couples that I wish doctors would stop using that method. Any time the doc tells you a "weeks pregnant" figure, ask for an estimated due date. It's the only way to keep it straight.

Write back! :)

[AnnieBrooke]

Also, get that ultrasound right away even if you have to pay cash. The later you go in the pregnancy, the less accurate ultrasounds are for trying to assess when the pregnancy began. (This is because some babies grow faster or slower than others.) It's worth knowing what you can know at this point, or you'll be left wondering for the whole pregnancy until you can get a DNA test.

[AnnieBrooke]

OK, so you are saying that on June 16, the doctor told you that you were 11 weeks 3 days along? And that's puzzling because it does not count back to April 14?

[AnnieBrooke]

And, just to clarify, this was the ER doctor? Or did they send you to the same ultrasound tech and ultrasound doc that you would have gotten to see if you had gone through with your original ob/gyn appointment?

[Purpleloverrrr]

Yeah it doesnt, & doesnt count back to March 16th either .. Yeah, on June 16th ultrasound tech did my ultrasound & the doctor i was assigned to at the ER came in the room 45min later & said the baby was ok & that the baby is measuring 11 weeks & 3 days at that time. My first ob/gyn appointment will be this thursday. Couldn't make an appointment after at that time due to my insurance.

[AnnieBrooke]

And one other thing, when the ultrasound tech told you that something about the baby did not coincide with the date of your last period, did she really say your hCG levels? Or did she actually say the baby's crown-to-rump measurement? The hCG level is taken by a blood test, and I don't think ultrasound techs even see it, and besides, the range of hCG levels that are considered normal at that point in pregnancy is super wide. For example, the normal range for hCG in the 7th to 8th week of pregnancy is anywhere from 7,650 to 229,000, and in the 9th to 12th week, it's 25,7000 to 288,000. It's hard to imagine, with the ranges that wide, anyone saying your hCG levels don't coincide with your last period. They could have been anywhere from 25,000 to ten times as much and still be normal for a wide range of weeks of pregnancy.

[Purpleloverrrr]

Yes she did say my hcg levels because i had took a blood test the day before & they had me come back the next day for an ultrasound to see if im having an ectopic pregnancy. So she asked me when the last period i had & when i told her she said you should be about 9 weeks along but it doesn't match your hcg levels. So i was thinking my hcg levels are low.

[Purpleloverrrr]

& she seen my hcg levels before she did an ultrasound because she had the papers in her hand.