Who’s the dad ???

[Mommyshark99]

Need help.. so my cycle was March 4-7 (28days length) I had sex March 10 protected but he still finished inside with condom on & had sex again different guy on March 13 unprotected he pulled out but don’t know if he pulled out to late or if he came inside me unexpectedly and didn’t know however found out I pregnant on March 31... April 13 I was 5 weeks and 5 days but no baby yet...May 4th I was 9 weeks and 5 days making due date Dec 12... who’s the father ??

[AnnieBrooke]

Hi, where did you get the computations of April 13, 5 weeks 5 days, and May 4, 9 weeks 5 days? Did you have ultrasounds?

[Mommyshark99]

I had my first ultrasound appointment April 13 and they said I measured around 5 weeks and 5 days but it was very early in the pregnancy so the yolk sac wasn’t formed yet. So when I went back on May 4 I measured 9 weeks and 5 days and they found a heartbeat and baby

[AnnieBrooke]

I agree that when you have sex with one guy protected and another guy unprotected, it seems like the unprotected guy would have the better odds to be the father. Is there anything about the protected sex that makes you suspicious of the condom failing, or do you feel like the condom might have been put on too late?

Also, how regular are your menstrual months? Do your periods always come every 28 days like clockwork, or are your months sometimes shorter and sometimes longer?

It sounds like the 5w5d  count was just based on counting from your last period, do you know if that is the case? When you had your second ultrasound, was the 9w 5d count given to you by the ultrasound tech or doctor? Were you given your due date by the doctor after he or she looked at the ultrasound, or did you work out the due date yourself by counting from the number of weeks GA they said you were?

Unfortunately for splitting the difference between the guys, an ultrasound in your ninth week is not as helpful as earlier ultrasounds might be. Some embryos develop faster and some slower than average, and size differences can begin to be apparent after the 7th or 8th week. Did the doctor or ultrasound tech say there was a margin for error (like, "give or take three or four days") when you were given your GA or estimated due date?

[Mommyshark99]

My mistake I keep saying 9 weeks and 5 days but that was on May 14...on May 4 I had to be like 7..8 weeks I don’t remember

[AnnieBrooke]

It really matters if the doctor told you the weeks and due date, or if you worked these out on your own. Can you remember that?

[AnnieBrooke]

Also, did you have sex with anyone after March 13?

[ppowb]

Sex on cycle day 6 is not in the traditional fertile window and has a low probability for pregnancy. Sex on cycle day 9 is close enough to ovulation CD 14 that pregnancy is possible. Sperm can last inside for 5 days. Couple that with the info that the first was protected and the second not, there is little doubt the second guy is the lucky one. The ultrasound dating confirms that ovulation was on schedule about the 18th or 19th.

[Mommyshark99]

“Little doubt the second guy is the lucky one” what does that mean ??

[ppowb]

I see why you ask. It means I think the second one is the dad. I can’t tell from your post which one you prefer.

[AnnieBrooke]

I keep thinking about the fact that you said "I had my first ultrasound appointment April 13 and they said I measured around 5 weeks and 5 days but it was very early in the pregnancy so the yolk sac wasn’t formed yet." By 5 weeks 5 days, there would have been a yolk sac, and also a fetal pole and heartbeat. This suggests you were not as far along as 5 weeks 5 days. (Even though, on April 13, you would have been 5 weeks 5 days from the first day of your last period, and until an ultrasound that would be how a doc would compute your weeks GA.) This is why I asked above which information you were given by a medical person looking at an ultrasound, and if you computed any of it yourself.

If the 9 weeks 5 days GA figure was given to you on May 14 by a doctor looking at your ultrasound, that suggests conception around the 21 of March, plus or minus 2 or 3 days. This would be consistent with your earlier ultrasound showing a baby not quite as far along as 5w5d on April 13. The 21st of March would rule out the guy on March 10, but it also would tend to rule out the guy on the 13th, unless that margin for error comes into play. That is why I asked above if March 13 was the last time you had sex before learning you were pregnant.

In short, if everything is as you say, with the April 13 ultrasound seeing no fetal pole nor heartbeat, the May 14 ultrasound indicating you were 9w5d gestational age, and with all of this information given to you by a doctor or tech reading the ultrasound, and none of it from you figuring out the weeks or due date yourself, then someone with whom you had sex in the week after the 13th (if there was someone) is more likely to be the dad than the guy on the 13th.

[Mommyshark99]

Okay let me start from the beginning...
On March 4 that was suppose to be day one of my cycle but since I was scheduled for a biopsy on my cervix for a colposcopy on March 4 it threw me off because the bleeding last a normal period cycle...my period only last for 4 days but since I had the biopsy done the bleeding last 5-6 days...soo I didn’t know if that was consider my cycle for the month or not...Fast forward to March 10 had sex protected March 13 had sex unprotected and haven’t had sex since. March 31 was suppose to be the day my next period cycle start but I was scheduled for the colposcopy took a pee test and found out I was pregnant...at the time I didn’t know how far along I was because my doctor wasn’t in that department so I had to schedule another appointment. April 13... on April 13 i had the vaginal US and the tech kept saying you’re early but they didn’t see a yolk sac soo after the US I was explaining to the doctor how I didn’t know if March 4 was my last period or jus bleeding from the biopsy soo at the time she was going off my last period which would’ve put me at 5 weeks and 5 days making my due date Dec 9....but the pregnancy wasn’t confirmed due to the fact there wasn’t no yolk sac heartbeat and etc soo May 4 was the next US date & they seen a baby and heard a heartbeat now I don’t remember how far along I was at that time but they said my due date was Dec 12...soo the dates were off

[AnnieBrooke]

It sounds like you didn't get pregnant by the guy on the 10th, in any case. Given that you had no sex after March 13, your early ultrasound results are surprising -- the lack of a fetal pole and heartbeat would fit the dates better if the sex with the last guy had been on March 15th, or 18th, or even as late as the 21st. But they definitely don't suggest the baby came from sex on March 10. Since the sex on the 13th was the last sex you had, (and of course since it was unprotected and the other sex was protected), in your shoes I'd go through the pregnancy feeling pretty sure the guy from the 13th is the dad.

If you're not married, do a DNA test when the baby comes so the legal father will be on the baby's medical record. It will also have the benefit that you'll never have to wonder about this again.