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Who is the father? Huge overthinker

Hi I’m really looking for some reassurance & peace of mind, I was wondering if anyone could help me... I’ve been told my due date is 8th June 2022 via ultrasound & I am currently 21 weeks & 5 days pregnant. According to my period apps I had a period near the end of July & my first day of my last period according to my period app was 26/08/2021 my cycles last for around 35 days but I don’t remember having these periods now. When I went for my first scan on the 13th October thinking I was 6 weeks along based of my lmp I was told I was just under the 5 week mark & had most likely ovulated later in my cycle only gestation sac & yolk sac was visible. I know the chances are I conceived in the September with my current partner but I seem to of came up with the idea that if a fertilised egg didn’t implant around the time of conception I could’ve conceived in the July by someone else, I slept with this person the one time on the 11th July even though I’m not even 100% sure if ejaculation took place so my question is, is it possible for a fertilised egg to not implant itself until a couple of months later I really hope this isn’t possible & it’s just me overthinking this is my first pregnancy & im also expecting twins so it’s something that’s really stressing me out being a overthinker, as I want nothing more than for both babies to be my partners & not from two eggs that were say fertilised in the July by someone else but that did not implant until the September. Thanks so much in advance
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134578 tn?1642048000
COMMUNITY LEADER
Hi, Sarah, I agree with the above poster that you have nothing to worry about. If an embryo does not implant in the uterus by about day 10 after sperm meets egg, it doesn't have the nutrients it needs to go on, and it fades away. You will not have had some secret embryo floating around for months and then implanting. It is medically impossible. So, no worries. Congratulations on the twins!
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6 Comments
Thankyou, also when I count back how many weeks & days pregnant I am from my ultrasound dates it takes me to the first couple of days of September of which I wasnt pregnant yet. The earliest I could’ve conceived with my partner would’ve been the 7th September. I didn’t think the ultrasounds included the first two weeks after the lmp.. so I’m confused on my period app it gives me a due date of the 2nd June & puts me a week ahead of what my ultrasounds say I am, but when counting back it still doesn’t give me the accurate date of conception which would’ve been from 7th September onwards. Do you know why this is?
In fact, I do.

In grandma's day, a woman would suspect she was pregnant, and go to the doctor, and lo and behold, she was pregnant. She would say "How far along am I?" and the doc would ask, "What was the first day of your last period?" And she would tell him a date (if she knew) and he would begin the count with that day and tell her she was X weeks along.  This is because a period is a big, obvious signal, where ovulation and conception happen quietly. If the woman said "Are you saying I conceived X weeks ago?" the doctor would say no, that is just where the count begins.

Though ultrasounds exist nowadays and can get very close to pinpointing the day of conception if they are done early enough, medically the pregnancy time period is still counted out exactly as it was in Grandms's day, beginning at day 1 of the woman's last period. All medical people use that count (it's called the gestational age count, or GA), and all medical texts, and the ultrasound machine, and "What to Expect When You're Expecting," and medical labs, and scholarly papers about pregnancy.  If her cycles are irregular in length, the ultrasound will assign a beginning point for the pregnancy time period that is two weeks back from the baby's assumed conception date, which it gets from the actual baby's actual size.

You said " I didn’t think the ultrasounds included the first two weeks after the lmp.," but indeed the GA they produce is done by adding the first two weeks. If you asked the doctor (like Grandma) "When you say I'm at X weeks, are you saying I conceived X weeks ago?" the doctor will still say no. He knows you weren't pregnant then, you were having a period! But all medical counts of pregnancy are calibrated to begin the first day of the last period, or on a calculated first day of the last period. It would be too confusing for doctors to count out gestational age one way and ultrasounds to count it out another way.

I personally hope that with ultrasounds becoming more and more common all over the world, this "adding two weeks at the front end for the gestational-age count" will ultimately go away, since it confuses women the world over, and actually has caused arguments or divorces when the couple had not been together two weeks before. But it will take a while. Not everyone in every country has access to ultrasounds, after all, and everyone in the medical world is used to this way of counting the GA.

Also, you asked why your app is not marching along precisely with your ultrasound results. An app is based on hundreds of women's average cycle lengths. Your ultrasound is based on your actual baby's developmental markers and crown-to-rump length. Once you have ultrasound-based measurements of your own real baby, you can throw your app out the window: you're not looking to know when an average woman with an average-length cycle conceived, you want to know when you conceived. Your baby's information tells you that.

And, this has nothing to do with sex two months prior to conception, in any case. Even adding two weeks at the front end won't take you back that far.
Thank you for your reply, do you know why my comments / posts keep being deleted from other communities? I can be waiting on a reply then the whole post be gone this is the only one that’s stayed up...
No, I don't. Sometimes a thread will be closed (or some comments removed from a thread) due to it violating the site's terms of service; maybe you fell in with a thread like that, but usually there would be a note from the moderator saying it had been done. You could look at the terms of service (we all agreed to them when signing up for the site) to try to figure out if that might have happened where you posted before, or write to the site moderators and ask.
Another possibility is that the original poster was well known to the moderators for excessive posting of their question, getting into arguments, being provocative, breaking the rules (such as, selling something) or just was a known troll. The whole thread might suddenly disappear in such a case.
Avatar universal
It was a true period in July because if you have gotten pregnant in July that means you would be due in April like me! Sperm can only survive 5 days inside you some 3 days! If your due till June you for sure got pregnant in September, I would trust your early it can only be off 7+/- days which it still gives September dates! You had two periods in between I wouldn’t worry at all!  You can use this calculator! https://www.calculator.net/pregnancy-conception-calculator.html?ccalcmethod=due+date&dueDateDay=06%2F08%2F2022&cLastPeriodDay=08%2F25%2F2021&cCycleLength=28&cUltrasoundDate=02%2F01%2F2022&cUltrasoundWeek=22&cUltrasoundDay=6&printit=0&x=136&y=29
I say all of this because I’m in a similar situation I only had one period in between and I’m freaking out!
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4 Comments
Thankyou so was your last period before conception in July?  How come you’re freaking out?
No problem, relax mama! I wish I at least had two periods
I had sex with this mistake guy on June 14th only once I even took a plan b on the third day, then I was with my boyfriend June 15th, whole month of July till now, so I had a period on June 26th it didn’t finish till the first week of July! Doctor and conception calculators give a July conception (July 19th) I guess I’m freaking out bc I feel guilty and scared /: but in your case I wouldn’t worry about it at all!
It doesn’t sound like you need to worry either especially if you took plan b & remember the period that followed, I think I’m stressing for the same reasons plus even tho my period app says I logged both periods & symptoms I don’t remember having them now.. but if a egg only has a short time to implant like I’m reading / being told it’s impossible for babies to be anyone’s but my partners going by dates & everything. It’s both our first pregnancy together, I’m 21 hes 6 years older than me & not got anyone pregnant before me which was also making me paranoid too doubting him I suppose.
I mean for sure I know it’s my boyfriends baby because it’s more than obvious with the early ultrasounds and the period. I’m assuming if I have gotten pregnant in June I would probably be due early/mid March. Girl I personally think we shouldn’t be stressing at all! All signs point to our boyfriends! Even tho it is very hard not to believe, the mind is very powerful and it can trick you /: but for sure for sure, you should be 100% good, you had two periods and early scan is very accurate trust me! And like I said if you have gotten pregnant in July we would probably be due around the same time! It’s impossible for the other guy to be the father, I get your anxiety because it’s also our first baby together he’s 25 I’m 22!
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