Seeking clarity about covert schizoid personality disorder. Thank you for assisting me.

[CuriousPsycGrad]

Hi there.
Thank you for taking the time to help.
I’m a Male, aged 23.
I am quite sure that I identify with the descriptions I have seen of a covert schizoid personality disorder. These descriptions talk about how some people with schizoid personality disorder can learn to present in public with an engaging and entertainingly warm and outgoing style; some schizoid personalities commit to a false self that is far more talkative, energetic, and embracing than they really feel they are at heart. They form relationships easily and frequently so as to compensate for a sense of inner emptiness and so forever mislead others (and maybe themselves) about their own true nature.
I was sort of a ‘Mr. Popular’ at my school, but it was all an elaborate and increasingly desperate act and I knew it. When I returned to live at home after graduation last June, I think I just about finally let my mask go and, along with it, my college relationships and I fell into spiraling depression. All I wanted was to be alone. I can barely even stand the thought of getting a job just because I feel constant anxiety and tension in the ‘outside world’, like I’m just not good enough or committed enough. I know isolation is not so healthy, yet somehow I feel the withdrawal is allowing me to reconnect with myself as deeply as I need to.

I feel I may have developed a covert schizoid personality and that I’ve learned over the years how to play the act to cover up for what I thought had been my natural deficiencies in life.
What I really need to know is: Is covert schizoid personality REAL? And does it seem from this brief description of me that I might have this disorder?
I’m half preparing myself to start communicating with my parents about this possibility, but I need to know for sure how much credence there is to the idea of covert schizoid PD. What I do know is that I have developed some form of personality disorder.
Thank you for your help.

[Abhijeet Deshmukh, MD]

Hello.

I am not sure if I have a good answer for this. There are a few authors who have published their hypotheses about 'secret' schizoid personality disorder, which could be the same as covert type. However, you should make sure this is not a depressive disorder you are dealing with. A covert schizoid personality disorder does not necessarily explain the depression you had after college.

DSM-IV TR and ICD-10 do not describe a covert type. And so far, it remains a subjective area. You might also want to consider 'personality disorder not otherwise specified'.

Hope this helps a bit.

[therese83]

Aw come on, everyone you see is putting on their public face.

Maybe you are depressed now, when you are you see everything, including your life through these kinds of glasses.