staring

[duringthis]

i stare at people's genitals be it man or woman
without any reason. it can happen anywhere any time and to anyone even relatives. i feel bad about it and very ashamed due to which i dont want to meet them anymore. what can i do?? need some serious help or else i can feel really low bcoz of depression

[Roger Gould, M.D.]

It is a very common thing to size up the other person by this automatic looking at genitals, but it seems to be exaggerated in your case at this time.  It means something to  you, and you should see it as something you are trying to work on in your mind about sexuality, and not something you have to be ashamed of...there are many different explanations to think about and it would be best if you could sit down and sort it out with a therapist.

[Jaquta]

This is way too deep for me.  It is best to work through this stuff with a psychotherapist.
My rather uneducated views though are:  absolutely it could be linked to depression.  Or probably more specifically to issues triggered by the relationship breakdown.
It could be that the behavior masks the anxiety that has been created by the rejection, etc.  But there are probably issues even deeper still.
I would strongly recommend you see a therapist to help you work through all this stuff.

I think I have probably confused everything and have got it all wrong.
We often have themes that keep replaying themselves (but in different contexts) due to our previous experiences.  You should follow up with a therapist.  Working through your issues should help resolve the depression.

[duringthis]

yah trying to be more positive but could it be linked with depression
i was in a relationship for 7 yrs and then i was rejected or rathr the relationship broke so i was really upset. also i was not successful in my career and i was towards a sustainble lifestlye which ws not accepted by people. i stayed alone too with parents for a while not interacting much and was really missing my ex and friends in college. are these the reasons for the problem. in my childhood have seen lots of fights and family fights.

[Jaquta]

I was thinking that this may be a safety thing.  Better to be aware than not.
Some people may be perceived as threatening.

[Jaquta]

I don't understand what's going on (which is OK because I'm not the expert -thank goodness!).
I think there will be a reason for the behavior.  Currently it may just be subconscious.
I think that because the staring involves a specific area that you may have issues regarding that.  I'm not sure if that would be sex or sexuality or something else entirely that it represents.
Could it be that you're using it as a reference to see what impact you have on other people (through arousal)?
Maybe it represents curiosity and learning??
I really don't know and I would only be guessing.  It will be interesting to read the doctors response to your post.
If it makes you feel any better you're not alone.  I sometimes catch myself doing that too.  I think I tend to do it with males (my father, sometimes my GP, not sure about my T).  I think I may have unresolved issues from childhood plus my parents and my older sister often walk around the house with no clothes on.  Not a pretty site.  It could be that I'm in denial regarding certain issues and I feel grossed out by most things sexual (probably from parents having sex in front of me when I was younger).  But with all that said I still want to be able to engage in a healthy relationship and so it is perhaps something I need to explore.  It is probably infinitely safer for me to do it while people are clothed.
I don't know.  Like I said it will be interesting to read the doctor's comments.