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17 year old male suffering MDD

Now i haven't been clincally diagnosed with MDD but I'm pretty certain i have it, im always depressed. 24/7. I do not want to be put on anti-depressants with nasty side effects and addiction. Now i am having a hard time wondering if i truly have MDD or if i'm just "another grumpy teen"i do not experience any of the joys of the teenage years, example: I become more depressed on fridays because i know i don't have any plans and it's an extremely lonely feeling. I'm a very negative person, i'm always the overthinker. However the only time i feel true happiness is when smoke one of the best drugs known to mankind, that is cannabis. I smoke weed everyday, i feel as if it is the only drug that takes away my depression, not just when i'm stoned but also for many hours after. People say this is an escape , I say this is medication, and for any other teens reading this! from personal experience marijuana CAN act as an anti-depressant and i would recommend it. However I've token many "legal anti depressants" and they do not work... they make me just want to take more?  But marijuana in my opinion is just a temporary solution and i know it won't completely cure my depression? WHAT can i do to be more positive and happy and no always be negative. OR maybe i m not even depressed? maybe im just always unhappy and it is my personality? Opinions anyone?
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Avatar universal
Note* I'm not encouraging Marijuana use, Personally I strongly believed it has benefited me in many ways, the problem is i can't always afford my "medication"
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