Determining if someone has depression really is not that simple. Based on your symptoms I would highly recommend speaking to your doctor. As to being embarrassed, don't be. There is nothing to be ashamed of at all. In the US it is estimated that 14.8 million people have depression, that is a lot! So you are NOT alone in this. Secondly some of the most famous people in the world have struggled with depression, athletes, politicians, artists of varying types, presidents, philosophers, successful businessmen. So you are also in good company if you in fact have depression. I can tell you from experience, while it was difficult at first talking to someone about my mental health, it was one of the smartest things I ever did. And has allowed me to be so much better off knowing the truth about what I am dealing with and has allowed me to be able to cope and to live a fuller life by facing my fears about having depression. I would really strongly recommend talking to your doctor. I hope that this helps you. I know what it is to struggle, and I wish you the best.
I think you might be depressed and there is no shame.Muster up the courage to ask your doctor because if it is depression it might not get better unless you put a plan in place to combat it.Meds can work really well to.They did for me.All the best.
From what you described in your post, you may be going through what is called Bi-Polar due to Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome.
You stated that you came out of an abusive relationship with your ex-boyfriend not long ago. And sometimes you have recurring nightmares of all the abusive things he did to you and that when your own son acts up and hits you it reminds you of your ex-boyfriend. These are classic symptoms of Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome.
I think it would be wise of you to go and seek psychiatric help for this condition. They may suggest that you start a regiment of psyciatric therapy coupled with anti-anxiety medications that will help deal with the mood swings.
I can't imagine all you've been through at such a young age. I had depression after my children were born. That could be harmonal plus dealing with the abuse. I am no-polar and you sound a lot like me. The important thing you need to know is that most people who experience depress have a chemical imbalance there are sera tones that our brain produce when they are out of balance we get depressed. Also after we have children sometimes our harmonies go crazy. The important thing for you to know is it's not your fault! The abuse was not your fault and the depression certainly isn't your fault. If you had diabetes you'd have nothing to be ashamed of so why suffer in shame with this. Often a regular doctor doesn't know that much about depression. I wish you could talk to a Phyciatrist. Also this site has a place where you can ask a doctor. Maybe that would help you understand what's going on. But please get the help you need it's scarey that your child can trigger the memory of your abuse and I know they can help you work through that. Please know people care I care. Best of luck Finsright. Ps you have NOTHING to be ashamed of!
First of all, there is nothing to be ashamed of NOTHING. You have gone through a very traumatic time and you are struggling to cope with the days that come, that makes you HUMAN. Sometimes after a stressful event, we become per-occupied with other thoughts and happenings around us or our bodies take a longer time to react to what has happened. At a sudden moment, all the emotions come rushing. It commonly happens after abusive, rape or death. Your mind tells you you are fine, and so you react the way "fine" people do until you are not fine. There is not shame in this and it is not your fault.
Failure to do so will result in you becoming so lost its not even funny. As your life continues, you will feel like you are stagnant or going backwards making depression worse. Nip it in the bud from now, do it for you and your son. He is going to need a healthy mommy in his life, he will need protection and help from you and if you can't, he won't get it. He needs you, so take care of yourself.
You need some help to accept what has happened and move on in order to get your life back. Seeing your doctor can do wonders. Your doctor can figure the exact TYPE of depression you are being plagued with and recommend steps to help you progress. There is medication, talk therapy or both-- in your case I believe you will need both. This is called getting help dear and anyone who says they do not need help in one way or the other is obviously lying. This is about YOUR LIFE and getting back those plans that were stolen for you. This is an opportunity to turn your nightmares into dreams, please take it.
Sorry I ended up putting my name in the middle there. I was going to stop but had something else to say and forgot to take it out.