Can anyone suggest....

[AutumnMiller]

A depression medication for me? Right now I'm on xyanex for aniety. I'm also looking into finding a therapy. I've been on xyenex for about 2 years now.. not regularrly though. maybe total 150 pills in two years. II started using them in 2006 when my 19 yr old sister overdosed on drugs and I continued because my 26 yr old brother has had bad cancer 3 times ( twice rare heart and skin) and right after my sister died we found out his cancer came back for the 3rd time.. he did surg and after his treatment we find out my mom has terminal lung cancer. They had me on Lexapo but i could only take it for a week. i didn't like how it made me feel. I'm 23 yrs old and I have a 3 yr old son. my mom has had cancer for a year now however its starting to get bad and its probably around the time i'm gonna call about hospice. I've read up on the things I have to do .. to be there for her.. and everything like that. I want yo be able to be there with her but my emotions are getting the best for me lately. If I had to guess i"d say she has like under a month left. lately i've been crying because of how stressed out I've been over the past week. I';m not a complainer/// or crier. I'm a really strong person. I'm worried that my emotions are gonna hurt my mom .. the way my dr prescribed my xayex is 1 pill 3 x a day as needed. Should I just take them Like that or does someone recommend a anti depressant? Thanks for any advice

[camie868]

sorry to hear all you're going through.  I'm sure this is why you're so depressed and anxious.  We all have really really tough times in life, but you need to learn to go about them without meds or drugs.  I myself just got out of treatment (60 days) for xanax addiction.  I've been on it for 15 years, started at .25mg when NEEDED, and before treatment was at about 6-7mg with no stopping in sight.  The withdrawl is a mother f**ker, and i wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.  
What i learned in treatment to deal with depression and anxiety/panic is eating healthy, and exercise.  I myself love **** food, and hate to exercise, but since i'm in recovery, i can't use the easy way and pop a pill anymore.  believe it or not, it really works.  
xanax is VERY addicting, and a ***** to get off of.  I suggest you throw them away ( i know, SCARY, right?) and go about it naturally.
i wish you the BEST of luck sweetie, you are obviously a bad ***, surviving all you have....  show yourself just how tough you are!

[AutumnMiller]

Thank you so much. I think this is what I took when I was younger and was having issues  bc of the stroke's effects. I think I remember my mom calling it a "happy Pill" lol. I'm gonna have to talk to my drs. I rarely take the xynex.. I used to only take it like 2-4 times a month. I've noticed lately though taking it maybe 6-8 times a mo.. I know thats not bad bc really.. its ony .25 mg. but its a little difference. I'm gonna try to get an apt to go talk to a psych and maybe they can see if that will be best for me. I also tried paxil I think .. But it caused black outs.

Thanks carletta! I appreciate it

[carletta500]

Hi, I've suffered off and on with bouts of depression and have tried to deal with it on by own without drugs some of the time.  I have found that by doing this it causes the depression to be more severe each time.  The last bout of severe depression I had the doctor put me on 300 mg of Wellbutrin XL.  This has helped me more than anything I've ever been on.  I am currently taking only 150 mg.  Hope this helps.

[caroleilleen]

Hi bev , listen i am reading alot lately about antidepressants and i think they are the last thing you and your son needs in your life right now.
One of my girl friends since school was addicted to xanax and its was so hard for her, friends and her family to watch her go through something that no one should have to go through, life is hard enough without adding addictions to it.
I lead a pretty stressful life, and things do catch up on me too but i choose to go the natural way, like Saint Johns wart it a natural form of anxiety relief, also a super multi for tiredness and irrability.
You said your self that u are a strong person please think about what u r about to do to your body and your mind just ask some people who have been on meds first and get some of your own feed back then made your decission.       take care caroleilleen

[AnnaE]

You are doing and going through so much. Take care of yourself. Accept all the help and support you can get. We are all here. You can seny any of us a private message, just in case you want to talk about something privately.

Take care
Get some sleep. Eat right  Exercise

[AutumnMiller]

Hi Bev.
Thank you so much

Yeah I try to be all I can.. for her and for everyone else. I'm a good person with a good heart but i've unfortunately had a lot of hard times. with death and cancer. It breaks my heart and I think i've been really really strong. I myself had a stroke when i was 13 and had to be put on antidepressants but don't remember what I took. When my sister died i finally said I needed help ( talking and meds) But the anti dep didn't make me feel like ME. So .. I will make an appointment sometime this week. with both a psych. and my gp for meds. Its hard bc I'm juggling so much and I'm worried that lack of sleep will add to it as well. I'm doing my moms job ( newspapers in the mid of the night) so we can keep the house .. its 3 hrs) my sunday job at a diner as a hostess and my waitressing job during the week. I also. during the summer go to school monday-thursdday 830-1030 but in the fall i have FIVE classes. and i'm a mom my 3 yr old is home 6 days a week. Its just so much and I think at the moment I am dealing with things well. I just worry a lot sometimes. But given my situation I guess thats normal

Thanks for your kind words and advice

[bev62]

You should definently be taking an antidepressant. You will need all the help you can get during her last days. I went thru the same thing with my father.  I'm sure your mother is very proud to have a daughter like you. I will keep you and your family in my prayers.

[AutumnMiller]

Hi Thank you. we are having hospice come out. my mom jsut got back from the drs this morning and her cancer is worse. Its really hard for me.. but i have to be there for her . ya know. Its just something i'll never forgive myself for if i'm not. I wish with my sister I could've been there more and If i could go back and change it I would. I have a lot on my plate. My mom has to work to keep our house. her husband is a pc of **** but we are inm a bad situation at the moment. So I am taking over her job ( doing newspapers) . Its hard and my mom hates that I am doing it. But thats what we do. I love her too much to watcjh her do that to herself. Thank you so much for your advice. you are right. I will find someone local. thanks again

[remar]

wow! you are really going through alot right now. i'm so sorry for your loss. i think an antidepressant is in order for you right now. it's takes longer than a week for them to start working and for most of the side effects to go away. why don't you try one again, only this time have them put you on a low starting dose so you don't feel so bad, then you can up the dose gradually if you need to. xanax can be addictive so do try to take as needed. and maybe you should see a counselor, your so young, just a baby, to be going through so much. my heart goes out to you and your family. my husband lost his mother to lung cancer a few months ago, he took leave from his business to be with her, she did'nt really want anyone but him. if she could'nt see him she would ask, where's Mark. we took care of her at home but it was hard. we we're scared and were'nt sure if we were taking care off her right, now i'm glad she was in her own home. hospice is wonderful and it sounds like you need it with having a 3 year old baby to take care of. let me know how your doing and take care. remar