Depression or ed?

[Melaljo]

Have I an eating disorder or depression?
Hi I'm worried I may have an ed
Since the birth of my son two yrs ago I had pnd lost a lot of weight my bmi went to 15.9
It's now at 17-17.5 (it was 18/18.5 pre pregnancy) I used to have a good appitite, it's now almost none existent I hardly ever feel hungry I get full so quickly I don't enjoy eating and think sometimes why bother but I know I must deep down, it makes me feel anxious when I've not eaten well as I worry about losing more weight again I don't want to! I'd like to put on half a stone which I think would give me a bmi of 18.5-19 (I've never been more than that used to be bmi 18) I find myself worrying and feeling anxious that I'm not eating but can't seem to eat when I'm not hungry, I've tried snacking but that was worse as I'd be too full for meals! Some days I skip a meal as I just don't feel hungry, if I'm hungry I will eat whatever I fancy but rarely have stuff like chips, crisps, cake ect I prefer less processed eg soups protein fish eggs beef hummus bread oats fruit and veg etc, I've switched to full fat milk and yoghurts but don't like nuts
I also count calories but not to keep them low only to keep tabs eg if I counted I'd had 600 I'd panic and try eat more but if its over 1000/1200 I'd also panic!! But not because i dont want to gain weight cos i do!!!But I don't really count properly just estimate and its probably a lot under estimate as I "forget things like milk in tea, half a biscuit, few grapes etc...  What is wrong with me!!

[MYoungAtHeart]

I struggle with an Eating disorder, always have, and have been in a treatment program for my ED.  What I learned along the way is that ED's are more about control then they are about food.

I am not a counselor but your story about your food and food choices and eating habits and concerns sound like an ED to me.  When someone is pouring so much energy and time and thinking into a process like eating which in the long run is something that every living creature has to do to survive, then there is a problem..

I do hope you are able to share your concerns with your medical doctor as you also could be suffering from postpartum depression and ask for a referral or to a group or therapist who works with Eating Disorders and depression.  I know you are busy with a baby but this is an important issue in your life.  I am not talking about In Treatment Programs, I am just saying that an hour once or 2 times a week with a qualified therapist might just put you back to feeling better soon...

Good luck to you

M

[Melaljo]

Hi thanks for reply
Yes I had pnd after child had ad for six months they helped but had a lot of side effects so had to stop
I still feel down and anxious and am trying to gain weight as want another child soon I struggle to eat most days just don't feel hungry get full quick this makes me anxious I worry I look anorexic
I feel like crying most days

[remar]

I'm not sure if you have an eating disorder or not. Most people will either over eat, not eat at all or get rid of food by vomiting. You said you know you need to eat and gain weight.
Have you talked to your Dr about any of this? Are you feeling depressed since you've had your child?