How can I get my life back!

[Keeva326]

This is kind of long but Ima make it brief, Ive been molested, raped, my ex use to slapped me, had 2 kids by two different men cause they were both no good, in between them tried dating other men but all they wanted was sex and not a relationship, and I wasn't ready for kids but took on my responsibilities and provided food, shelter, and clothes for them both, finished high school with honors and college, right when I finished college I thought everything was starting to fall in place I was in another bad relationship that was off and on for 3 years, I knew he was cheating but I didn't want to continue to be alone, but look at me now I got what I deserved one night of passion do cause a lifetime of pain, he ended up leaving me and my kids for 6 months to go stay with another woman, in that time I figured I should make plans to get with someone else since he wasn't coming back but I made the worst mistake ever I got careless and contracted 3 std's between the both of them 2 were curable but one wasn't, and it was HSV1 & HSV2, its been since April and I still haven't gotten over it and don't know if I will, Im spiraling out of control everything makes me upset and Im angry and want to scream and haven't been able to sleep correctly for years, I hollering at the kids throwing and busting up stuff hitting myself telling myself Im ugly when people clam im gorgeous, im pretty, but I don't see that, I haven't been able to love myself and im trying to get counseling cause I don't want to hurt myself or others. I just want to kill the both of them but I cant go to jail nor be away from my kids, Ive been going to church and praying but I just don't know what to do anymore, Somebody please Im begging ya Help Me Get Back on Track, I don't want to lose everything!

[Crystal413]

Good for you! You sound really motivated and that will take you so far. My best to you, Crystal

[Keeva326]

Thank you so much Crystal I needed to hear that I do got to work on myself first so that I can love everybody else im goin to counseling Tuesday and Im going to get my life together!

[Keeva326]

Thank you for telling me about that I will try it out and I hope I see some kind of change cause I need it and I want to be happy, and get my life together, things are hard but I know I can get thru this with great and wonderful ppl in my circle.

[Crystal413]

I'm really sorry for all that you have been thru and are going thru. My best advice to you is to seek out some counseling. I believe this will help you a lot.
Please remember your children are not to blame here. Taking it out on them is only hurting them and in the end YOU are right back were you started from. Have some compassion for yourself and your kids.

There are many things you can do to help your situation. Exercising, which gives you feel good endorphins, even brisk walking will help. Meditation, yoga and as I mentioned before, Therapy. Please help yourself to feel better and you will also feel like a better mom. We are always here for you if you need us.

Try to remember you don't need to have a man in your life until you get your own life together. You just end up hurting yourself and your kids. Thru therapy you will be able to work thru many things including why you pick out the wrong type of men.

[toourlady89]

Hello, just reading up on your situation. Understandably, could cause emotional pain and anger and hopelessness. My suggestion would be for you to take Magnesium supplements, the relaxation mineral. Not a lot of people know about Magnesium yet but I am trying to make it be known. It will help you out. This is safe to take, healthier and our body needs it.
Best to take instead of medications.

Magnesium is a supplement that our body needs and apparently due to the nature of the foods that we eat, we are now all low in Magnesium. .
For FYI
Rapid recovery from major depression using magnesium treatment.
From PubMed

Major depression is a mood disorder characterized by a sense of inadequacy, despondency, decreased activity, pessimism and sadness where these symptoms severely disrupt and adversely affect the person's life. Antidepressant drugs are not always effective and some have been accused of causing an increased number of suicides particularly in young people.

Magnesium deficiency is well known to produce neuropathologies. Only 16% of the magnesium found in whole wheat remains in refined flour, and magnesium has been removed from most drinking water supplies, setting a stage for human magnesium deficiency. In magnesium deficiency, neuronal (BRAIN) requirements for magnesium may not be met, causing neuronal damage which could manifest as depression. Magnesium treatment is hypothesized to be effective in treating major depression . These magnesium neuronal deficits may be induced by stress hormones, excessive dietary calcium as well as dietary deficiencies of magnesium.

Case histories are presented showing rapid recovery (less than 7 days) from major depression using 125-300 mg of magnesium (as Mg glycinate or Mg taurinate) with each meal and at bedtime.

Magnesium was found usually effective for treatment of depression in general use. Related and accompanying illnesses in these case histories including traumatic brain injury, headache, suicidal ideation, anxiety, irritability, insomnia, postpartum depression, cocaine, alcohol and tobacco abuse, hypersensitivity to calcium, short-term memory loss and IQ loss were also benefited.

Dietary deficiencies of magnesium, coupled with excess calcium and stress may cause many cases of other related symptoms including agitation, anxiety, irritability, confusion, sleeplessness, headache, delirium, hallucinations and hyperexcitability, with each of these having been previously documented.

The possibility that magnesium deficiency is the cause of most major depression and related mental health problems including IQ loss and addiction is enormously important to public health and is recommended for immediate further study. Fortifying refined grain and drinking water with biologically available magnesium to pre-twentieth century levels is recommended.