Being anemic can cause such problems . The pharmacist is right , what are you waiting for? Also check for adrenal and thyroid problems .
I recommend dr burns book "the feeling good handbook" , and another "adrenal fatigue - the 21st century health syndrome"
are you taking good care of urself? before you started feeling this way was there any major traumatic event?
I have always been a grumpy person. Since I was about 10. Which is when something 'traumatic' happened, and then things got worse at about 14 upon more 'traumatic' things...but that was just a general down feeling lasting for a long time. Until recently I had no strong feelings against life and such.
I was going to check the thyroid thing out, as I have most of the other syptoms. Although no family history.
Can you see another doc? Mine is top notch friendly, so I don't like to hear you are down but can't get help.
"I was diagnosed as being...well really messed up. The whole reason Drs are urging people NOT to self diagnose, there's no way I have a depressive disorder, an anxiety disorder and borderline personality disorder!"
Do you mean the self diagnosis from the site came back with those results but you do not believe they are correct? I don't know about the personality disorder, but anxiety and depression can go hand in hand feeding each other. My pharmacist and several doctors at my doc's clinic told me that, when I questioned the doctor's prescription, since I had thought I only had an anxiety problem with a depressing personality.
If your personality is depressing or pessimistic, (as mine was to some degree) you may not be aware that it can possibly be changed with effort and right thinking. Meds can't make you happy, but they can take away the veil of unhappiness that results from a depression, so you get a break long enough to take control of your situation.
I had to go on meds last year but was able to go off them 10 days ago. It is a long story but you can read my journal by clicking on my photo and then reading the "journals list" at the bottom. I explain how I went from never ending grey days to normality, but only with the use of meds to peal away the grey.
there is still controversy about the cause of depression ... is it due to chemical imbalance in the brain or twisted thinking? which comes first?
dr burns book about cognitive behaviour therapy is very good .
YOU CAN HEAL YOUR LIFE is another best seller . Author suggests how we create our future with our minds and thoughts and there is ample medical evidence what we believe becomes true for us speically with our bodies . That's why we should never diagnose ourselves as mind will then find something . I hope you feel better soon and keep us updated.
I'm sorry you are going through this. I know what depression is like and it is not much fun - if that is indeed your problem.
According to your post you think about suicide, you have dropped out of college
due to low self esteem and anxiety attacks, and you are chronically tired.
Such symptoms strongly indicate a psychiatric problem and you ought
to see a psychiatrist for an evaluation.
I think you may be a bit hasty in deciding to "hate" all doctors because of your experience with one or two and you should be persistent in finding someone you whom you can get along. They are out there.
Good luck to you.