I thought 2008 was a bad year, and, despite my cynical nature, went into 2009 expecting that things could only get better since I felt I was pretty much at rock bottom. I'm not one to complain, but it gets to the point where I need advice, but I don't want to ruin the image I've created of myself for the people I know. I'm now stuck asking help online, and I'll admit I'm not entirely comfortable with it. Nevertheless, I need to hear an opinion.
It's impossible for me to make this sound significant, it just seems that no matter how much these things may affect me, they're never going to be important for anyone else. So far this year, aside from feeling entirely isolated and alone (which I've made my peace with, it's been over a year) I've gone from spraining my ankle, to being back on my feet for a week before I am assaulted by someone 4 years older than myself. I find myself concussed and unable to focus on schoolwork. This happily coincides with my birthday, which I hardly noticed. To make things worse, the week after I have finally recovered from this attack is a much needed holiday, but I somehow end up throwing up and dehydrated for the duration of this. Starting school again, I have been going for 3 days before I find my ankle once again fractured, and myself unable to stand or distract myself with sports as I have been doing.
It feels like regardless of what I do or want, these things are just going to keep happening, and I find myself unable to do anything to combat it, which only makes me fall deeper and harder. I'm not at all superstitious, but I don't know how to get out of this cycle.