Your symptoms seem to point to Borderline Personality Disorder or Antisocial Disorder coinciding with exponential Anxiety/panic attacks. You should see to an appointment with a medical professional—be it a psychiatrist, neurologist, or even a general practitioner—before assuming any disorder is in place, though.
hey it sounds like you need to go to a physician it sounds like a medical issue have you ever had an illness or physical recently? i am sorry to here about your problems i am only 13 and it dosnt sound normal you need to go to a docter quick good luck and take care you can talk to me any time if you want