Stress / Depression / PMDD

[emily21182]

Hi, my name is Emily, I'm 34 years old, have a boyfriend and together we have 3 kids. We live in a two bedroom house in northwest Ohio. We aren't rich but we aren't poor. He's a contractor and I have an eBay store and also do some cleaning. Our kids are a 15 year old girl, a 13 year old boy and a 8 year old boy. We also have a dog. So that's me in a nutshell.

I lead a high stress life. Our kids are not "ours" he has two from two different mothers, mine has a different father. So, that alone, makes my mothering job like one thousand times more difficult. We struggle as a couple, we are both recovered alcoholics/addicts and both have very strong personalities and sometimes that leads to conflict. Overall though, we have a pretty healthy relationship.

Lately, I have been having a definite increase in health issues. I have always had mild depression and anxiety that seem to get worse the week before my period. I have always had mild back pain, and always had mild issues with my sleep patterns.

When I was 31 I hate to admit this but, I terminated a pregnancy, it screwed with my head so bad I've never been the same. Not to mention since I've been in my thirties though, my whole body seems to be going out of control. My depression and anxiety have gone through the roof, especially the week before my period. I become non-functioning, spells of crying and feeling hopeless last anywhere from twenty minutes to four days. My back pain has become unbearable at times, mostly lower back pain, but no injury, no like logical reason for the pain. My doctor has me on Lexapro for the depression and anxiety, changed my birth control to Mirena to try and reduce the period associated symptoms and gave me Neurotin for the pain and Tramadol for the pain when it really gets out of hand. But, I'm still suffering, Honestly, I just feel like the more medications they add the worse I get. I've been going to the doctor over and over and over again for the last four years describing the symptoms and trying new things, but nothing is working.

I feel terrible, I didn't use to be this way, I used to be strong, it used to really take a lot for me to go off the handle or be brought to tears. Now it seems like an every few days occurance. I cannot keep living like this and my family cannot be made victim of me much longer. I feel like everything is spinning out of control and there is no where to go for help. My children don't deserve this, my boyfriend knows I have issues beyond my control, but is getting really sick of dealing with them. I feel like I am going to ruin my relationships with all of them and that I have become a terrible mother and partner because of these health struggles.

Has anyone else had symptoms like this? Have you ever heard of PMDD and has anyone actually been diagnosed with it? I believe I have it, but my nurse practitioner just diagnoses me with Major Depressive Disorder. I believe stress and my menstrual cycle are ruining my health. My back problems have been diagnosed as osteo-arthritis, but the treatment doesn't work at all and the symptoms I read about don't line up with the symptoms I feel. I feel like there could be something seriously wrong with me that they are missing, or that they think I'm making up my symptoms or something. I am exhausted at trying to figure this out. Any advice, help, resources, anything would be very very very appreciated.

[Paxiled]

I fear you're suffering a common problem -- you sound like you're having a hormonal problem, but you're being treated with drugs that don't do anything about that.  The only logical thing was altering your birth control to see if that helped.  The bad back and emotional problems right before a period is very common PMS, and needs to be dealt with as a hormonal problem, not with a host of drugs that suppress everything but don't treat it.  That's my two cents worth, anyway.