You are showing a lot of symptoms of depression and some anxiety. Concentration and memory take a hit while you are depressed you are not really living life but letting time go by. You have a purpose and you are likely a great person it is just going to take a push.
Sometimes we wait for something to happen. We think "well if I just had a better face, or money, or a group of friends, or whatever-than I would be happy. The bad thing is that there are likely great things going on all around you just wishing that you would discover them. It is like waiting to be rich.....which is crazy but anyway.
If you are brooding all the time thinking "I wish I had money so that I could buy this or that" and you are walking one day and spot a penny on the ground but pass it up....
You don't rrealize that had you stopped and picked it up; you would have been one penny closer to getting that thing you desired.
It is not going to happen over night and it is likely going to be a long process and that is just the cold hard fact about it.
I like that you said you do good things to make you feel better. I do too and it works for me. If you want to do some reading you can check out some things I have written that help me fight depression. If nothing else you may get a laugh out of some of it.
Read these if you wish and let us know how you are doing.