You have a lot of company in this, with our current economic situation! I think everyone has had to tighten their belts to just survive, and at least you have a job. I know many men who have lost their jobs and cannot support their families in any fashion. This is the time your family needs to pull together, have a family meeting and discuss all this. All of you decide what can be done to cut back on expenses, explain that you're doing your best (which you are) and that you want to make the best of this situation. I know it's depressing, it is for all of us but you can only do so much at this point. There are tests you can test that tell you what you are best suited for, and you can get this thru a therapist. Maybe this would help you determine what you would like to do, but it's a tough time to look for a job. If you feel this is all becoming over-whelming for you, then see a psychiatrist and the two of you determine what route of treatment is best for you. Depression can make it hard for us to be motivated to do anything, or even think straight, and this may be your problem. See a psychiatrist and go from there. Good luck and take care.
I just wanted you to know you are not alone.I have suffered from depression for 6 years. I know sometimes the feeling may be unbearable and it's easier to just give up. However your family is there for you regardless of how much money you make or what kind of job you have.
Also- try taking some B12 vitamins- they are shown to reduce anxiety and stress (which are factors that cause depression) and also vitamin D - from my experience these two work wonders!
eat foods such as: spinach, bananas, brown rice, vegetables, kiwi, walnuts, whole grains, fish, cabbage, milk,
foods to avoid (they make depression worse) - caffeine, foods high in sugar or fat
other things that will help:
1) exercise- even if it's just for 15 minutes a day
2) drink lots of water
3) go outside (lack of sunshine causes depression)
4) let your family know that your going through a rough time , remember they are there to help you- even if you just tell your spouse- it will make you feel better to know you are not alone
and lastly....remember you are a good person regardless of your job status or how much money is in your bank account. Don't put pressure on yourself and beat yourself up. You are doing the best you can right now for the situation you are faced with.
Tomorrow will be better :)
Hopefully this post isn't too cheesy , I've just felt the way you are right now- so just wanted to offer you some hope that things do get better.