Aa
i wont last this coming week
hi my names jack and i don't know why im posting this i don't know what help anyone can give me. but anyway. last year i fell in love with the most Beautiful girl i have ever laid eyes on though i didn't know she liked me in that way at all. she looked incredible. well anyway i was friends with her sister too. witch made it awkward when we went on Coffee dates with with her every week. we worked in the same shop that's where i met her. then half way through the year we got drunk at a party and did some things that we both regret now and after that night my life has never being the same her sister hates me we used to be the best of friends,the girl i like hates me and to make matters worse two months after the incident she went out with one of my close friends and i saw them the day they started goingf out and they were holding hands and grinning at me if i wasn't going to a friends house that night i probably would have killed myself i felt so betrayed. months went on and i still loved her as much as i did when i first looked at her 14 months ago my life has gone downhill and i have gone into drugs and alcohol i have tried to kill myself so many times i shouldn't exist anymore its now being 14 months since i first met her and i love her so much and she doesn't give a **** weather i die or not i have tried to forget her hundreds of times but its not working.also a three of weeks ago i had flashbacks to when i was a child and there was i man and it was horrible i cried my eyes out im only 17 years old. i could never tell me parents anything about what is happening to me simply because they have no idea that im unhappy.(and i dont trust them at all) by the time somone reads this it will probably be to late (the photo of me and her is the only one i have)
Hey,
I am only 15 but I felt EXACTLY the same with my ex. I thought my life was over. I started cutting myself and trying to comit many times but I have to also think that I am only young and someone will love me for me one day. I will always be here if you want to talk :)
I am only 15 but I felt EXACTLY the same with my ex. I thought my life was over. I started cutting myself and trying to comit many times but I have to also think that I am only young and someone will love me for me one day. I will always be here if you want to talk :)
Yea man, cease contact, it make take a year or so to heal but you will. Avoid mood altering substances, those can wreak havoc on your life..
My goodness. I hope you are still OK, but what you need to do is find the nearest hospital and check yourself in NOW.
This is serious. You need to walk into the hospital and tell the nurse on duty that if you do not get help you will hurt or kill yourself.
There is no reason to suffer in silence or to force yourself to do something that will end your life. Your life is precious and you only have one. Do you think so little of yourself that you will throw it away over one person? I am in my late twenties and I have seen several close relationships end, if I had killed myself after my first boyfriend dumped me (right before the Holidays!), I never would have met my husband.
I lost sleep and weight and my will to live, briefly after one break up but two years after I met my husband and my life is great! It gets better!
This too shall pass.
So get help NOW. Let others help you, you need it.
This is serious. You need to walk into the hospital and tell the nurse on duty that if you do not get help you will hurt or kill yourself.
There is no reason to suffer in silence or to force yourself to do something that will end your life. Your life is precious and you only have one. Do you think so little of yourself that you will throw it away over one person? I am in my late twenties and I have seen several close relationships end, if I had killed myself after my first boyfriend dumped me (right before the Holidays!), I never would have met my husband.
I lost sleep and weight and my will to live, briefly after one break up but two years after I met my husband and my life is great! It gets better!
This too shall pass.
So get help NOW. Let others help you, you need it.
This is going to sound very cliche, but suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. This heartache you're going through will pass one day. It seems like the end of the world right now but trust me it will pass. But you need to be a better friend to yourself and stop throwing gasoline on the fire.
First: Cease all contact with her. Avoid seeing her in person, stop looking at her photo, stop going down memory lane thinking of her. It's much harder to get over someone if you have to see them every day.
Second: Stop with the drugs and drinking. You are numbing yourself with depressents that are only worsening your depression. Especially when they wear off. Learn to cope with life's challenges holistically...that is, drug free.
Third: Take some solice in knowing you are not the first person to suffer a broken heart. Thousands of songs and poems have been written, movies made, and books published on the subject. You aren't alone. Everyone goes through it. I went through it at your age, and again in my twenties. It's part of life.
Fourth: Ask yourself why you THINK you loved her in just a short period of time. Take a mental inventory. Often, you'll find there wasn't all that much substance. You developed an intense infatuation with the image you created of this person. She made you feel good when you were around one another, but that in itself isn't love.
One thing you have to remember, you placed this person on a pedestal. When you look back on your friendship with her, you tend to only remember the good that you knew. I swear to you she has faults and flaws like every other person. I really don't think you ever had ample time to get that close and see into one another's souls. You created an illusion of the perfect girl in this person. She's not perfect. Don't allow yourself to be swept away by physical beauty either. If this girl was homely you probably wouldn't be suffering right now. We put way too much stock into the physical appearance of the opposite sex while overlooking character flaws, incompatibility, and sometimes glaring red flags that this isn't the right person for us.
Start spending more time with friends and casually date other girls. You don't need to compare them to her, just get out there. The more you do, the easier it will be to get over this girl. Remember what I told you early on, cease all contact with her, stop obsessing over her photo and living in the past. You won't be able to move forward until you do.
First: Cease all contact with her. Avoid seeing her in person, stop looking at her photo, stop going down memory lane thinking of her. It's much harder to get over someone if you have to see them every day.
Second: Stop with the drugs and drinking. You are numbing yourself with depressents that are only worsening your depression. Especially when they wear off. Learn to cope with life's challenges holistically...that is, drug free.
Third: Take some solice in knowing you are not the first person to suffer a broken heart. Thousands of songs and poems have been written, movies made, and books published on the subject. You aren't alone. Everyone goes through it. I went through it at your age, and again in my twenties. It's part of life.
Fourth: Ask yourself why you THINK you loved her in just a short period of time. Take a mental inventory. Often, you'll find there wasn't all that much substance. You developed an intense infatuation with the image you created of this person. She made you feel good when you were around one another, but that in itself isn't love.
One thing you have to remember, you placed this person on a pedestal. When you look back on your friendship with her, you tend to only remember the good that you knew. I swear to you she has faults and flaws like every other person. I really don't think you ever had ample time to get that close and see into one another's souls. You created an illusion of the perfect girl in this person. She's not perfect. Don't allow yourself to be swept away by physical beauty either. If this girl was homely you probably wouldn't be suffering right now. We put way too much stock into the physical appearance of the opposite sex while overlooking character flaws, incompatibility, and sometimes glaring red flags that this isn't the right person for us.
Start spending more time with friends and casually date other girls. You don't need to compare them to her, just get out there. The more you do, the easier it will be to get over this girl. Remember what I told you early on, cease all contact with her, stop obsessing over her photo and living in the past. You won't be able to move forward until you do.
thank you so much for your advice i dont know if it will change anything but i am going to try and make a change in how i am and see if i can final get over this problem that has being getting at my head for so long even if it leads to a more black hole
You're a gorgeous boy! This is just one girl, there are going to many other girls, that's a promise. I've been like this about my ex and i couldn't get over him. You need to get help with your alcohol and drug problems. There is always a reason to live and this seems 10x as bad than it actually is. Honestly, don't do anything silly, no matter how how on the edge you feel. Believe me... i've been there, i've tried 4 times to end my life and it hurts the people around you that care so much. If you need to talk to somebody then feel free to mail me, i want to know you're okay x
Hello,I lost my only brother and there is not a second that doesn't go by that I do not think of him, I miss him so much it's a horrible feeling please do not put your love ones through that.if you don't mind me saying you are a very good-looking guy and you will and get so many girls. Wow very good-looking you have so much going for love yourself look in the mirror. Do us and everyone that loves you especially yourself just go and talk to a professional listener and remember we are all here for you. Very good-looking. Your friend Dina from Jersey.
Hey!
First of all, beauty doesn't grin!
You are very young, and I have actually gone through the same thing you are going through.
You may find that girl to be beautiful, and that is really nice, but a serious lesson that I have learned, from girls driving me crazy, is that we get hooked on one girl and think the world of her, and if it doesn't work out we get hurt. But the truth is is there are so many beautiful girls out there, and I promise you, if you give it more time, you will get better from this and become attracted to another girl. This has happened to me over and over again, and now I am 29, so you should really listen to me.
Even recently, and it lasted for years, I was obsessed with this girl that I thought was absolutely beautiful and I was determined to be with her. I'm not with her now, and looking back, I don't see her as beautiful as i once did. I would have never thought that 3 years later of going crazy for this girl, that I would now be more attracted to another girl, then another! You have to understand that this is the nature of the danger of love. We get so obsessed over one girl and become destroyed by our own obsession.
If she doesn't like you, this should be enough for you to move on! I mean, you are 17, and actually a very good looking guy. And I'm not gay. You should give other girls a chance, they're beautiful too! :)
What I have learned from being rejected from girls that I have become obsessed with, is to not be obsessive.
And after 29 years, and battling with trying to get with girls, I am now learning what I believe is a much more realistic, and fulfilling approach to love. I am now being able to not expect anything out of someone, but rather, to allow a girl to be attracted to me, and then still don't assume anything. It is like a kitten. If you try to get the kittens attention, it will hide from you. But if you are sitting there looking peaceful, attractive and loving, the kitty will want to jump on your lap. And if you try to bring the kitty closer to you, it will try to get away. But if you sit there being peaceful, attractive and loving, the kitty will want to come closer to you and want you to pet it.
The key in life, and to getting what you want, and to being with a beautiful young woman/girl, is to not try to possess her, but to be able to be beautiful, loving, attractive yourself. And to be these things, you have to be humble. It is still good to show someone how you feel about them, but the attraction should be mutual. From now on, you should try to not possess that girl, or any other girl.. and just be a nice person. Hey, if someone doesn't like you in return, then do you really want to be with that person?
You are still very young right now, and you can and will get better, and get over this if you give it more time, and get support about this too. I don't trust many peoples judgement either, but I have confidence that there are people in your life that would surprise you with how well they would be able to understand and help you with this!!
You can find a lot of support on here too!
Cheer up and realize that there are so many others right in your town that are depressed and hurt and beautiful and wan't to be loved. And take care of yourself. I'm here if you want/need to talk.
Peace :)
Ash
First of all, beauty doesn't grin!
You are very young, and I have actually gone through the same thing you are going through.
You may find that girl to be beautiful, and that is really nice, but a serious lesson that I have learned, from girls driving me crazy, is that we get hooked on one girl and think the world of her, and if it doesn't work out we get hurt. But the truth is is there are so many beautiful girls out there, and I promise you, if you give it more time, you will get better from this and become attracted to another girl. This has happened to me over and over again, and now I am 29, so you should really listen to me.
Even recently, and it lasted for years, I was obsessed with this girl that I thought was absolutely beautiful and I was determined to be with her. I'm not with her now, and looking back, I don't see her as beautiful as i once did. I would have never thought that 3 years later of going crazy for this girl, that I would now be more attracted to another girl, then another! You have to understand that this is the nature of the danger of love. We get so obsessed over one girl and become destroyed by our own obsession.
If she doesn't like you, this should be enough for you to move on! I mean, you are 17, and actually a very good looking guy. And I'm not gay. You should give other girls a chance, they're beautiful too! :)
What I have learned from being rejected from girls that I have become obsessed with, is to not be obsessive.
And after 29 years, and battling with trying to get with girls, I am now learning what I believe is a much more realistic, and fulfilling approach to love. I am now being able to not expect anything out of someone, but rather, to allow a girl to be attracted to me, and then still don't assume anything. It is like a kitten. If you try to get the kittens attention, it will hide from you. But if you are sitting there looking peaceful, attractive and loving, the kitty will want to jump on your lap. And if you try to bring the kitty closer to you, it will try to get away. But if you sit there being peaceful, attractive and loving, the kitty will want to come closer to you and want you to pet it.
The key in life, and to getting what you want, and to being with a beautiful young woman/girl, is to not try to possess her, but to be able to be beautiful, loving, attractive yourself. And to be these things, you have to be humble. It is still good to show someone how you feel about them, but the attraction should be mutual. From now on, you should try to not possess that girl, or any other girl.. and just be a nice person. Hey, if someone doesn't like you in return, then do you really want to be with that person?
You are still very young right now, and you can and will get better, and get over this if you give it more time, and get support about this too. I don't trust many peoples judgement either, but I have confidence that there are people in your life that would surprise you with how well they would be able to understand and help you with this!!
You can find a lot of support on here too!
Cheer up and realize that there are so many others right in your town that are depressed and hurt and beautiful and wan't to be loved. And take care of yourself. I'm here if you want/need to talk.
Peace :)
Ash
Don't do it! I know what it is like not being able to talk with your parents. I always am able to convince my mom I am ok. She finds out when I end up in the crisis center. You should see a counselor. About your ex not caring if you were dead or alive, not true, she would definately be affected. Possibly blame herself. If you stopped yourself from killing yourself before, you can do it again. Keep yourself busy, that's what I gotta do. I've attempted 3 times. You usually get found and helped. I don't know if you are religious or not but maybe that can help. I give God credit for me still being here. I still live at home and the first time I tried to kill myself, I believe God lead me downstairs and one of my family members called 911. Ketting help and changing your thought patterns is a lot of work, but it might be worth it. I still get suicidal at times, but I have someone to talk to about it and I don't act on it. Sometimes it means being "locked up" like in a crisis center or hospital, but whatever it takes to keep you safe.
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