Aa
Aa
A
A
A
Close
Avatar universal

Divorcing a Psycopath

I have recently separated from my husband who I believe may be a psychopath. We had a whirlwind romance and within 18months we were married with a baby. He grew up overseas and i have never met his family.  He has an Aunt and Uncle where we live and he has attatched himself to them. We recently discovered that the day my family was robbed he was not working as he said he was. He demonstrates no empathy for me. He does get emotional but only for himself. He collects weapons and behaves like a little boy with them. He is 40years old and i was always finding knives near where he slept and under his mattress, numchakas under the car seat, etc. He has a very explosive temper. He is above average intelligence and is musically gifted. He acts dumb sometimes in front of people. he grew up in a very violent environment and has horrific stories of growing up, which he tells with almost detatched amusement. He was exhibiting dangerous parenting to our 5 month old which if i tried to intervene he would scream at me. I caught him having an affair. He says he hates this woman and he will do anything to get me back. I told him to go to a psychiatrist if he wants to see his daughter and he won't go. I still feel that he can manipulate me. Do you think he is a psychopath? what is the best way to divorce? should i take as much money as i can (he has not given me any since the separation) or will this make him angry and should i just go 50/50. How do i do this without aggrevating him?
3 Responses
Avatar universal
Not the marriage I am in now, but I had a baby 16 yrs ago w/ a man whom is now gone. I was 20, he 24. He showed all the signs you tell in your story... He was diagonosed Bi-polar when he was 22. I ended up leaving him when our daughter was one... He went in the Navy for 6 years, came back, and got involved w/ another woman w/ a 3 yr old boy. I was unsure of his "stability of mind." I stopped his visitations because of his physcho behavior... He was very smart, loved fishing, you would think your average guy. BUT, if you knew him, you can tell he was on that half border crazy side. Anyways, he flipped one day and hurt his g/f's 4 yr old son... The little boy died and my ex sits in prison for life, no parole. My gutt instinct told me years ago to run w/ my daughter. My gutt told me 6 years ago when he came home form the service- NOT to send my daughter w/ him. ALWAYS TRUST YOUR GUTT!!! I feel horrible for what happened to the little boy... So awful. But- my daughter and I are alive and safe. Leave now.

Get a PPO. Don't have contact w/ him... Everytime there is some kind of arguement and he is taunting you, call the PO everytime. Go to the friend od the court and tell them you do not want him to have visitation due to fear of your and your baby's life. Even if you have to drop the child support... Get your family involved (I did). As many friends and family that knows, the better. Do not want to scare you, but sometimes I wonder if I had stayed w/ my ex, maybe that would of been my daughter dead at 4. I couldn't talk to his g/f about his crazy behavior because he would rebel back on me. I tried. I loved her little boy. She was just getting ready to leave herself, too-
Avatar universal
Thankyou so much. i really  appreciate your story. and i will take your advice. everything you said really speaks to me and gives me strength to do it.
Avatar universal
Sounds dangerous, especially the weapons, take care of yourself please and the kids.
Have an Answer?

You are reading content posted in the Divorce & Breakups Community

Top Relationships Answerers
Learn About Top Answerers
Didn't find the answer you were looking for?
Ask a question
Popular Resources
How do you keep things safer between the sheets? We explore your options.
Can HIV be transmitted through this sexual activity? Dr. Jose Gonzalez-Garcia answers this commonly-asked question.
For people with Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD), the COVID-19 pandemic can be particularly challenging.
A list of national and international resources and hotlines to help connect you to needed health and medical services.
Here’s how your baby’s growing in your body each week.
These common ADD/ADHD myths could already be hurting your child