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Avatar universal

mid life crisis for men

I would like to find out for those of you men out there if you have gone through this and why?  The reason I am asking is 3 weeks ago my husband came home and told me he didn't love me anymore.  He said I love you as a person, and respect you.  This is after being with him for 31 years and doing everything for him.  Taking care of him while he was sick, when he lost his job, standing by him.  I was also asked to care for his dying father last year he was battling cancer, I agreed, I cared for his dad in our home 24/7 until he passed.

Can someone explain to me how a husband justifies to himself this is right to do to his wife.
179 Responses
Avatar universal
it could be  you are co-dep on him, and maybe he found someone else to lean on.  I have found the more you do for someone the more they hurt you.
Avatar universal
No I am not co depen on him.  I want to know how men justify hurting their families.  How they rationalize doing this is ok by them.
Avatar universal
Is he depressed or on meds
hows his job?
any major events in the last year besides his father dying.
is this the first time he wanted to leave?
Avatar universal
I don't know if he is depressed,  He walks around happy.  He say's he loves his job.  He lost his father and a close friend last year.

I always thought we had a loving marriage.  Guess he fooled me
Avatar universal
Sounds like you did have a loving marriage for almost 31 years, however people change and grow apart for some reason.  Love is never constant it is alway evolving.  
Question? are you happy and do you love your self?
Avatar universal
No I am not happy I just lost my husband, who I love more than anything.  People change yes, but overnight?  This does not make sense to me and I just don't understand how a man can justify to himself that this is ok to do to his wife and kids.  Selfish I think.

I do love myself, but this is a trying time as you can see for me.  It's only been 3 weeks.
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