Avatar universal

38 yr old male long time erectile dysfunction

I could use advice on where to turn for help with my long time ED issues. I'll try to keep it brief and yet detailed:

First had sex when I was 17 with a year long high school girlfriend. Couldn't get an erection hard enough for penetration. I had to manually stimulate myself until hard enough for penetration, but the effort brought me so close to climax that by the time intercourse started it made the time very brief. I dated her for several years after, and rarely had an erection good enough for penetration.

Every women that followed was the same issue, and almost always required heavy foreplay, or manual stimulation before achieving and erection good enough for penetration. This erectile issue was not only with partners, but with myself during masturbation. Usually, my erection would fall flaccid seconds after getting fully hard. I always needed continuous manual stimulation to keep it hard. This, of course, was incredibly frustrating and depressing. I could never keep a woman around very long partly because of my erectile dysfunction.

When I was 25 I finally starting seeing a urologist for help. He dismissed me saying it was psychological and that I was too young for ED. He suggested I see a therapist for sexual help. I tried therapy for awhile, but none of the suggestions helped. I finally convinced the urologist to give me Cialis. Bam! It was a night and day difference. I was finally able to have stronger erections, good enough for penetration, probably 60% of the time. It wasn't perfect, but it was better than nothing.

Now, I'm 38. I still take 5mg Cialis daily. Sometimes I go to masturbate, and my erection is difficult to maintain (while watching porn usually), and then I will realize I forgot to take the medication for a couple days. When I go on a date, I take 10mg just in case. But recently, I met a woman who is wonderful, and I want to make her happy. So I've taken up to 15mg of Cialis sometimes. My erections with her have been decent, but not perfect. We use condoms, which reduces sensitivity, and one time I went flaccid during intercourse. It was incredibly embarassing, and disappointing. I don't think I should continue escalating my Cialis dose. Additionally, I just gave myself vision loss in my right eye from so much Cialis in a short amount of time; a condition they diagnosed as "central serous chorioretinopathy". It might be permanent. I'm very upset about this too.

One morning, I tried having sex with this woman, (having taken 15mg Cialis night before), but I couldn't maintain an erection for penetration. She tried giving me oral sex, and I went flaccid during that too, which has never happened before. I tried manually stimulating myself to orgasm with her help, but I couldn't get hard. It was like my penis was dead. This has never happened before. I blamed my issues that morning on my anxiety about not having much time before I went to work, but I know it's because something is wrong with me; whether it's venous leak, or anxiety, or nerve damage, or whatever.

Since 25 years old, I have tried multiple medications, diet changes, psychotherapy, pelvic floor therapy (they said I have a tight pelvic floor. I now use a device to stretch my internal pelvic floor muscles through my anus weekly). Has anyone ever tried Dynamic Infusion Cavernosometry or Doppler Ultrasound to diagnose venous leak? Do my issues relate to you? Any suggestions would be appreciated. Thank you for reading!
1 Responses
Sort by: Helpful Oldest Newest
20620809 tn?1504362969
Sometimes if we are a heavy masturbater in between sex, the penis becomes desensitized and add on some psychology to it of being nervous or worried and it's rough. I do think that having the ultrasound you want would make sense. Is your doctor willing to do it?
Helpful - 0
Have an Answer?

You are reading content posted in the Erectile Dysfunction Community

Top Sexual Health Answerers
139792 tn?1498585650
Indore, India
Avatar universal
Southwest , MI
Learn About Top Answerers
Didn't find the answer you were looking for?
Ask a question
Popular Resources
Millions of people are diagnosed with STDs in the U.S. each year.
STDs can't be transmitted by casual contact, like hugging or touching.
Syphilis is an STD that is transmitted by oral, genital and anal sex.
Discharge often isn't normal, and could mean an infection or an STD.
STDs aren't transmitted through clothing. Fabric is a germ barrier.
Normal vaginal discharge varies in color, smell, texture and amount.