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Having issues with my equiptment

Okay here goes .. im turning 35 and am or was married to a gorgeous lady now im not to sure when my problem started but i know after my girlfriend of 5 years before i met my wife i during that relationship my little guy was fine the odd time here and there when i just couldnt keep it hard .. after i left her and started seeing someone it took really a long time to get him to react ..porn i always had and that seemed to do the trick but with someone it was a struggle to get hard fast forward to now i get horny really horny but i get then scared to act on those feelings as i have really no idea what is gonna happen down there ..

I remember when i would just think of like porn or something and would get an erection but that doesnt happen .. i could be fully in the mood and i would only be mildly erect my wife said she is sexual and im not but its not the case i just battle .. there are time i would of loved to have just taken here but fear would kind of get to me ..we went a whole year with out it .. she said the way i would start she didnt like .. as i would massage her body till eventually he was ready and mid way i feel him start to say sorry captain this ship is going down.. i have no idea if the link is broken .. im doing the kegal exercises .. started running in the mornings .. i am a person who likes my sugar and porn.. could it possibly be the porn ? ive been with my wife for 7 years and this is one factor that is driving us apart .. i even tried a tablet called bang bang and didnt help .. i didnt feel any change except for the next day when i felt horny and looked down to see my guy standing on end so im also thinking it could be blood flow possibly ... your ideas ?
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Avatar universal
It is very likely that it is a venous leak. To start with, you MUST tell your partner, and not just before you go to try, that will just seem like an excuse. If you don't tell her, you will have psychogenic ED on top of whatever else is going on and that will be really hard to fix because if they treat for both and it doesn't work, you wont know which didn't work or if both didn't.  Explain it to her... women are really understanding when you don't blindside them.
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Hi there thank you for the info was just on google now checking it out. I have said to my wife / friend as i dont quite know where we stand about my issues that it would take long to get erect and after penetration it would at times alot just mellow i guess i can say .. but i will look into this and see thank you really appreciate your input
Avatar universal
Your welcome my friend, anytime.  If you have specific questions, I would be happy to provide you with an email address for a more private conversation.
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Avatar universal
Venous leak is a possibility - however, here's another Q for you: Do you have any trouble getting erections from self-stimulation? If so, that would indicate this is more of a psychological prblm than physical. You have said yourself that you get nervous & wonder if it's going to 'happen' - that sounds exactly like so-called 'performance anxiety', which is when a guy starts thinking too much about whether he's going to 'perform' (terrible term!). It's also occasionally possible for guys to have prblms getting had even during self-stimulation due to so much anxiety about performance.

Another Q - do you still wake up with erections, either in the morning or late at night? If so, that's another sign your prblm is more psychological than physical.

I would advise seeing your reg Dr. first - I know it's embarrassing to discuss this issue, but remember - it's extremely common! Just look at the number of ads for Viagra, Cialis & even 'natural' treatments for ED! Your Dr. won't be at all surprised by your Q, and in fact, for all you know, if your Dr. is a male (especially a bit older), he may suffer from this issue himself! ALso,  because it could also be an early indicator of blood they need to know if there is in fact a physical - pressure, circulation & cardiac issues. If you reg Dr. can't solve the issue for you, get a reference to  a good Urologist who deals with ED issues.

I wish you luck with this & please come back here & let us know how you're doing & what was found...
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