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7266738 tn?1389862687

Long term TTC - Clomid - losing hope

This is more of a vent than a question...
My hubby & I have been TTC for 4 years. I have just completed my first round of clomid (not fun!) and I fear AF is on her way :(
I have learnt to cope very well over the years, been to plenty of baby showers, christenings, first birthdays ( I am a godmother 3 times over) but it's seems to be weighing on my heart again lately and I am getting sad seeing my pregnant friends belly, the preggo updates on FB etc
And I think it's because I have lost hope again.
I know we are going to be that couple who will have to go through 400 rounds of IVF :(
Hubby has low & slow sperm and they don't know what is wrong with me, and my explorative operation is on a waiting list  a year long... Very frustrating.
Thanks for listening x
8 Responses
Avatar universal
I'm there with u except I have pcos... Just watched my 23 yo brother and his just turned 20 yo gf have a beautiful baby girl.. I'm 37 and would give anything for my hubby and I just to have one... So I'm with u in the losing hope again category... Its so frustrating.... Sigh
7266738 tn?1389862687
***** doesn't it :(
Funnily enough I just got invited to yet another baby shower since I wrote my last entry! I am 32 and all my younger siblings and friends already have children (most were 'accidents' )
I guess we just have to hang in there. I don't want to be one of those bitter women...
It Seriously can get tough though can't it?!
Avatar universal
I knoe how you feel. Ive been ttc for over 3 years. Clomifene didnt work and im on the waiting list for an op and ovarian drilling. I share you doubts and fustrations. Xxxx
658499 tn?1394900011
Sigh. .. all we can do is continue to try to convince while enjoying all the other celebrations of life that we're privied to be a part of.  I think as you get older and continue to see everyone else's happy baby blessings, it starts to wear on you. In my case, I was always happy for all my family n friends. But when it hit me, if start to be down because I realized I wanted the same thing but it hadn't happened for us 'yet'.

I knew in my heart it would but not knowing when can make u crazy sometimes. I must say tho that in the end I always remained faithful although patience was tested at times :-)... Not sure what you're currently doing in terms of next steps in ttc, but don't give up!

If one thing doesn't work, move on to the nect with an open mind and thoughts of victory at the end of it all... my husband and I have been thru a lot and we can now finally say, we have a family :-). It was all worth it and would do it all over again in a heartbeat. It'd def be hard reliving losing our daughter but that experience happened for a reason and made us stronger people and family...

Keep at it...mcd
1187113 tn?1320695096
Keep trying.  I know it's easier said than done but it will happen. We have been on clomid for 4 cycles now and still no baby #2...I'm going to start back using the Instead soft cup this go around as I truly believe that is what helped me conceive #1 (which took forever to get). Don't give up hope!!
7266738 tn?1389862687
Thank you all for your kind words!

I received another baby shower invite in the mail today (yes that makes 2 in 3 days!) AND on top of this my best friend just rang today to tell me she is pg with #2... i was initially happy for her and then when i hung up the phone burst into tears!  -i was officially at my breaking point-

I can't believe that i was the one who wanted children way before any of these girls and i'm the one still waiting :(

Waiting for my gyno to come back from holidays (more waiting yay!) to get my 4th blood test results back to make sure i'm ovulating, apparently the last blood tests i did were inconclusive. I have already asked him to refer me to a fertility specialist so we can get started on IVF but he wants to give it more time... because apparently 5 years of unprotected sex isn't enough?

I live in a small town so changing doctors is not a simple task and fertility clinics are between 3 and 4 hours away... soooooo frustrated.

I'm usually a positive person but i think with all these announcements i am feeling deflated and helpless. I know these feelings will pass and i will be back to my old self (i'm sure this clomid is making me more emotional!!) Thank you for letting me vent :)
  
Avatar universal
Try taking Maca Root. Google it. Its natural & healthy.
Avatar universal
I understand what you are talking about. I'm 32 and all my friends and all people I know are pregnant or having children. I was born without a uterus. There is no way for me to get pregnant. I chose surrogacy as an option. But this is not a short process. I'm happy now because I have something which gives me hope. At the same time each birthday announcement, each baby shower is very hard for me. When I see photos of my friends’ children on Facebook I feel like depression hugs me tightly. I really have no idea how to cope with it when you ttc for a long time or facing infertility. I really hope to start my journey soon. Maybe this year I will have a baby. I'm sure motherhood will change my life.
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