Totally frustrated with f/u visit

[FaithNHim]

My hubbie and I went to see the RE after our 2nd failed attempt. We received the news on Christmas of the BFN. Well, we had our f/u visit yesterday to discuss our "next step". RE originally informed us that we would get a free cycle after embryologist stated that out of 15 follicles there was only 1 egg.
RE stated that it must have been the med dosage(1st attempt RE was fearful of OHSS and I had to coast for three days) and stated the 3rd cycle would be on him. Well......when we got there, he hired another assistant (it was her 1st day). He welcomes us and apologized for the failed attempt and proceeded to inform the assistant that we just had a failed attempt from a frozen embryo......DH looks at me all confused as I gasp at the RE and inform him that he has us confused with someone else. I had to literally explain each cycle to him and what happened before he says....ok, now I am remembering you (he has the file right in front of him). He then asks me when was my last cycle and I inform him that it was 5 days after I stopped taking progesterone which was the 29th of December. He then asked...."Are you still taking the birth control pills?" I said, no sir.  He states, "why not?"
This will prolong your next cycle. Come see me again after your cycle come on and take the pills the same day your cycle starts. He also says that I am responsible for paying for my meds, embryoligist and the anthesiologist. I was LIVID! What happned to the free cycle? I feel HORRIBLE!
DH and I do not have the funds to go anywhere else to start all over again. I feel totally violated and let down. What should I do at this point?

[FaithNHim]

Thank you for the suggestion, I will definitely go to the mentioned website. I spoke to DH and he agrees that we need to speak to someone else before our next appointment.

My RE never told me how long I would be on the pills before I was to start the next cycle.
You have taught me more than my RE. I appreciate you for that.I am going to write my RE a letter and explain how I feel.

Keep me informed of your progress. I am SSBD your way.

[SDScientist]

I am still waiting for AF Day 38.  This is my first natural cycle since my failed FET.  I just talked to the Dr yesterday and he told me that he will start me on bcps on D4 of my cycle.  If I don't start AF by Monday I too am going to have to get it induced and then start the bcps on D4.  I looked at my old charts and my previous RE was also starting me on D4/D5.  My Dr also recommends at least 10 days on the pills.  This is long enough to bring on another AF right before you start stims.  I have to be on them by 1/30 and off them on 2/10 for a 2/19 stim start.  Your Dr may be of the school of thought that a "rest" cycle is not necessary b/w cycles which is why he is okay going back to back.  Some feel this way.  He should do a u/s though to make sure all your follicles are have shrunk back down and there are no cysts left.  bcps will help with this, but I am proof that even a month of those doesn't always quiet the ovaries back down.  
Don't feel humiliated.  We pay these guys lots of money to do what they do and we expect them to take the best care of us.  Sometimes we just need to be proactive and stern with them.  I finally told my last RE not to talk to me like I didn't know anything and that I wanted X, Y, and Z done and I questioned everything he did, but for $10K a cycle just for his services he can answer everything I ask.  I really do encourage you to at least talk to another Dr as to arm yourself with more information.  Try going to haveababy.com->Discussion boards->West and describe your cycle (meds, eggs, embryos) and ask what they thing went wrong with the 15 follicles, 1 egg and what they would do.  The REs will answer you within a day.  

[FaithNHim]

Thank you for your input. We go through enough without having to deal with issues such as this. I was also wondering why he would ask for me to start the pills right after a failed attempt. I felt totally humiliated. So many people speak highly of him in Jacksonville, Florida but many have complained recently in the waiting room, etc.
I am so confused and feel like an "experiment".

SDScientist: When should I start my birth control pills?
RE stated that if my cycle does not come on by the 27th of this month, he wants me to come in on the 28th for a shot that will cause my cycle to come on and then I am to start the birth controls again....is this the right process before starting another cycl?
How long should I take the pills before the stims?

I am so confused.......

[SDScientist]

Just an honest opinion...this Dr does not sound like he knows what the heck he is going on.  Why would you go back on birth controls right after a failed cycle?  Most Drs make you wait a month to rest the ovaries then start birth control pills followed by another round of stims.  Even if he was going to do a back to back you definitely wouldn't start bcps the day you start your period.  Usually you start these 3-5 days afterwards.  My suggestion...get a copy of your medical and embryology records and see if the Dr made a note somewhere about what his free cycle entailed.  Also take those records and get a second or even a third opinion even if it just for informational purposes.  I learned a lot from my second, third opinions during my quest for a new Dr.  The Dr I am now going to after 3 failed attempts with my previous RE will do free phone consults (he is in Las Vegas) and he is really good at being able to pinpoint what could have caused the issues in a previous cycle.  At least you could go to your Dr armed with some information from other Drs.  From what I know about the free cycle deals is that the meds and anesthesia are not included in the "free" services since they are from outside providers, but the embryology usually is since that is part of his clinic.  I have heard that some clinics will give you the stimulations meds for free but you have to pay for the rest.  Sorry you are dealing with this.  

[Heather5]

Oh man, how disappointing!!! I would maybe sit down and write him a letter. That way, you can take your time and think about what exactly you want to say and how you want to say it. Sometimes, it's hard to remember everything and stay calm in a situation like this if you speak to him in person.

Just an idea...

Good luck, and keep us posted on the outcome!