Still born baby:( Malpractice?

[mommyluv02]

Hey all i just wanted to get you help and opinion, My Nephew Dustin and his girlfriend Jenna were due to have a c-section today to a deliver a baby girl. She went in last night in pain and they found the baby had died. Now she had gone into labor last week but the doc stopped it because she had a scheduled c-section scheduled already. She was full term when she went into labor and the baby was alive then they are not sure when she died. Jenna does not want to have an autopsy done on the baby, but in order to have a malpractice suit one would need to be done. Now i think that what the doctor did was malpractice, but i wanted more opinions before i went to her with this.

And if you would please pray for them my nephew is a very fragile kid with problems with depression.

Thanks
Amanda

[mommyluv02]

Hey guys thanks again for all of your help and thoughts. Jenna has decided to have an autopsy done on the baby. Jenna has been through so much i hope that she is able to get through this, and of course it wont be easy, I also was told today that Jenna has pneumonia and is on suicide watch. I hope that this passes because she had a beautiful baby boy at home that is little over a year old. He is to little to understand things but he will know if mommy is not around so i hope that she pulls through. I know she will hurt for a long time and that this wont be over tomorrow so i have told her that if she ever needs to talk to anyone that she can calll me anytime of the day and i will listen. This baby was an oops, so she is feeling that everyone thinks its her fault and that everyone is happy that the baby is gone. But we are all really sad and would not wish this on my worst enemy, i just hope that she sees that we are all here for her and that she is loved and hopefully that will help her.

I will let you guys know the autopsy results when i know.
Amanda

[anxi]

My heart goes out to Jenna and Dustin.   I also found out my daughter had died at 35 weeks this May.  It has been the most devastating time of our lives.  The pain is incredible and no one understands just how all consuming it is.  Both Jenna and Dustin are going to need your support.  Just be there for them.    Sometimes people say or do things without thinking  that cause even more pain.  What is even worse is when people act like nothing has happened. Try to see if they would like help with the funeral arrangements or being with them when putting away baby's things.

Luvkayln says she blames herself.  I also blame myself  I told my doctor my baby was not moving enough and was told it is running out of space.I should have demanded more attention/tests but i thought they know what they are talking about even though in my heart I did not feel right about not being checked.  It is hard to .not focus on the I should haves.  Somehow we need to learn to forgive ourselves even though I'm not entirely sure it's possible.

I know this just makes sense but Dustin and Jenna are not the same as they were and they never will be.  Everything has changed for them and  they will not just get over it.  I wasn't allowed to break down I was expected to just get on with things and fix my life.  I was told not even 3 weeks after my loss by my own father " I don't understand why you are taking this so badly."   My mother would not allow me to cry.   Let them know it is ok for them to feel whatever they are feeling, it is ok to show it..  There is no time limit to anything and there is no need to rush anything.

Luvkayln is lucky to have such good photo of her little angel.  Kayln is truely beautiful.   This pain Jenna and Dustin are suffering is so lifeshattering that I truely wish no one should have to endure it. For those of us who have experianced it just knowing that someone else is hurting  causes us heartache.  If there is anything I can do let me know.  If at any point, whether it is tomorrow or even years from now,  Jenna or Dustin want to talk to someone who understands I am here  

[LinaG]

Dear Amanda,
I'm very sad and sorry for your family Dustin and Jenna and their angel baby girl, let her rest in peace.
God bless them both and give them courage and strength to continue with their lives. My thoughts and prayers go out to them.

I don't really know what to say about autopsy, but if it will help parents is better to do that.
LinaG

[Tracy489s]

I'm so sorry to hear about your Nephew and Neice's pain!  I can't imagine their pain, or yours luvkayln, but I would definitely do the autopsy.  Delaying the birth because they already had the C set up is just ludicrous at best.  Please tell her to research it as soon as possible!!

[baboojamaica]

God bless Dustin and Jenna and their baby girl.  I am so sorry, my thoughts and prayers go out to them.

[mama1981]

My thoughts and prayers go out to you, your nephew and his wife during this very difficult time.  Words alone cannot describe what they must be going thru at this time.  Please keep the faith and again you all are in my prayers.

marline

[mommyluv02]

Hey all, Thanks for the advice and the warm wishes. I talked to my sister in law today and she said that Jenna had to be sedated today. I also talked to a  few friends that are nurses and they also think that they should do the autopsy. But with her have to be sedated i dont know if it will happen. Again thanks and i will keep you all updated.
Amanda

[lil_sweet_thang]

i would deff do the autopsy if she was full term and in labor they should have let her have the baby and if there was problems that made it to where she couldnt deliver on her own they should have done an emergency c section also if they had to stop the labor she should have had a follow up visit with her ob did she and was the baby ok at the visit ?? i still dont get y they would stop the laber if she was full term

[aweeonetolove]

I'm so sorry to hear about your Nephew and Neice's pain!  I can't imagine their pain, as well as yours luvkayln.
My aunt suffered a Stillborn birth and allowed for the autopsy to occur.  It helped to identify the blood clotting issues that she had.  If she had not done the autopsy, the same issues would have happened in her next pregnancy.  Instead she has three beautiful children.  I had a MC at 12 weeks and allowed them to examine my wee little one so that I could arm myself with all the necessary information if and when I get pregnant next time.  
I don't know anything about malpractice or how/what to advise your niece and nephew.  I can only imagine that they need all the support you are providing them with right now so that they allow themselves the time they need to grieve.  All the best to you and your family in your recovery from this loss.

[krushing]

I'm so sorry!  I don't have any guidance, but I know if it were me I'd want the autopsy so this could possibly be avoided next time.  Your nephew and girlfriend are in my thoughts and prayers!

[luvkayln]

I lost my baby girl last December when I was 8 months along. She was also stillborn, due to a knot in her cord. Nothing was ever wrong with her, she was always right on her growth, everything was perfect about her. I delivered her on December 17th, 2007, and had found out on the 16th I had lost her. I really often like to blame myself because the Thursday before I had her, I had really bad contractions and knew i should've gone to the doctor. I even called them, but they reassured me it was from braxton hicks contractions, and to just go home and lay down. I know in my heart if I would've gone there that night, they would've done an emergency c-section on me, and my Kayln would be here with me right now. I can't blame anyone but myself on that one, because I listened to them and didn't go. I'm sorry, I'm sitting here at work typing this bawling thinking about it all! I'm so sorry this happened to Dustin & Jenna, my heart is with them. I know exactly how they feel. It's the worst pain I've ever felt in my life. My little girl was just fine the night before we lost her, she even had the hiccups. I miss her so much, and I hate the fact that I don't have her here. I have a picture posted of her on my profile, if anyone wants to see how beautiful she is! My thoughts and all of my heart are with them! The pain never goes away, ever. Just be there for them, and listen, listen, listen. That's the best thing anyone can do for them right now. Please contact me if there's anything I can do.

[mommyin10]

I'm so sorry for you & your family!  I don't personally have any guidance, but I wanted to offer my thoughts & prayers to Dustin & Jenna.  God bless their little one.

[gokuangel]

I would have the autopsy done! The exact thing happened to my SIL's friend. The week b4 she was to go in she went to the hospital and they didnt chk her and the next week when she went in they said the baby had died inside her and when they did the autopsy they found out the umbilical cord had blood clots in it and the baby had stopped growing at 7 months along! Since they found out the problem they were better able to monitor her when she became prego again and this time around they took the baby 1 month early and she had a healthy baby girl!! Now i dont know nor saying something could be wrong with your nephew's wife or anything but i do think the autopsy would be best to know what happened and in case she does any type or illness or other prone problems like my SIL's friend! GL and my prayers and thoughts with you for your loss!