Hi Noahsarksd
You seem pretty clear that you have a sugar addiction. Certainly your description corroborates this: you start and end your day eating sweets and always have candy around you. It might be important to determine if you really are a sugar or food addict, since all of us, addicts or not, are attracted to sugar. We are hard wired to desire the energy dense 'hit' that sugar gives us. The food industry has created foods that will make all of us salivate for their products - whether we are addicted or not, we will want them.
The reason why it is important to know if you are a sugar (food) addict is because this will determine your solution. You say that you are having a hard time finding a credible solution on the internet; I bet you are finding many different answers and don't know from which to choose. If you are an addict, the solution is simple: you cannot wean yourself from sugar (anymore than you can wean from cocaine or alcohol if you are addicted to those). Rather, you have to abstain from them and suffer the withdrawal. Thankfully withdrawal sx (cravings, agitation, cravings, irritability, cravings, insomnia, cravings.....) will only last a few weeks if you truly abstain from them. If you keep 'cheating', the cravings will never go away.
Most of the solutions that you will find on the internet are not designed for a food addict. Even if the expert is offering the solution for 'food addiction', if their proposed solution suggests that you can learn to 'moderate' sugar to reasonable levels, this will NOT work for the addict. Even the smallest bite off someone else's place will awaken the 'phenomenon' of cravings and make you want more, and more, and more.
So how do you know if you really are a food addict? See if these questions below apply to you. If you think you might be a food addict, the answer is simple (but not easy!). You must stop eating sugar completely, one day at a time. Please have a look at my website at addictionsunplugged.com for more info on food addiction, as well as some resources to help you stop. For example, there are a number of 12 step programs that are available for the food addict, looking at how to manage food from the addiction framework. If you answer yes to a number of these questions, you may want to call these groups, since it is very difficult to stop any addiction, especially food, on your own.
The 20 questions for food addiction:
1. Have you ever wanted to stop eating and found you just couldn’t?
2. Do you think about food or your weight constantly?
3. Do you find yourself attempting one diet or food plan after another, with no lasting success?
4. Do you binge and then “get rid of the binge” through vomiting, exercise, laxatives, or other forms of purging?
5. Do you eat differently in private than you do in front of other people?
6. Has a doctor or family member ever approached you with concern about you're eating habits or weight?
7. Do you eat large quantities of food at one time (binge)?
8. Is your weight problem due to you're “nibbling” all day long?
9. Do you eat to escape from your feelings?
10. Do you eat when you’re not hungry?
11. Have you ever discarded food, only to retrieve and eat it later?
12. Do you eat in secret?
13. Do you fast or severely restrict your food intake?
14. Have you ever stolen other people’s food?
15. Have you ever hidden food to make sure you have “enough?”
16. Do you feel driven to exercise excessively to control your weight?
17. Do you obsessively calculate the calories you’ve burned against the calories you’ve eaten?
18. Do you frequently feel guilty or ashamed about what you’ve eaten?
19. Are you waiting for your life to begin “when you lose the weight?”
20. Do you feel hopeless about your relationship with food?
Copyright © 2000-2010 Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous
You got it! That is the essence of addiction - the phenomena of cravings that starts with the first bite. That is why they say it is the first drink that gets you drunk, not the fourth!
Wow, one thing which stood out to me is when you said if you taste a hint of it the beast awakens. This is very true and noone understands it. Everyone thinks oh just one will not hurt you and your diet.