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Are You a Negative Person?
By Dr. Dennis O'Grady
Today, someone said to me again: "I'm having a bad week. I have a horrible attitude. I'm trying to change it around, trying to be more positive. My teenager is a help...giving me advice about attitudes and how we can vent positive to each other or negative...that it's a choice. She's really changed. I need to change, too. Nothing serious, just life stuff." Being a positive person isn't rocket science; it's all laid out on this Web site for you to USE.
ARE YOU THE LEADER OF YOUR OWN LIFE OR TOO LAZY TO RUN YOUR LIFE SHOW?
We all are addicted to negative thoughts when we allow them to run over our best-laid plans and take root in our brains. When you are being a negative person, silently to yourself or vocally to someone else, these close-minded traits are activated. They run your life show and run away with your communication skills:
1. Believing it's easier to be negative. Yes, it's easier to be negative but it's more productive to feel alive and able to be surprised and curious about yourself and your valued relationships.
2. Being lazy. Yes, every human can be lazy and do what they've always done that isn't any fun. A negative person salutes their laziness and doesn't change it.
3. Negataker. Negative people talk tons of verbal trash inside their own skulls and complain vociferously to everyone they come into contact with. The complain game is a safe haven and prison.
4. Psychocritiquer. A negative person is critical of everything and everyone. Negative people don't meet anyone they can't dislike or find fault with. They'll pick the lint off the suit or dress of successful thinkers.
5. Too smart for your own good. Mental horsepower ramps up the negative talk. Unfortunately, negative people are often pretty brainy, which adds enormous horsepower under the hood. Negative thinkers can get in trouble quickly on the relationship highway.
6. Don't care. "I don't care and no one is going to break my heart!" is the neurotically defensive battle-cry of beleaguered contrarians. They play it safe and will feel sorry some day for all the heartbreaks that life has laid in their path. Why not be a "Merryian," instead?
7. Change resisters. When you are punch drunk with negative thinking, you will use the No. 1 change resistance mechanism: criticizing self and others for a failure to be perfect. That's why I say the blame game and shame game are totally lame.
8. Un-Stupid. My definition of stupid is "being brave enough to care," and of stupid behavior as "daring to care." Pessimists are too busy picking and analyzing the lint in their belly buttons to learn something new by truly enjoying their ignorance.
Oddly, negative people are often saluted for being "pragmatists," "logical types," "fearless predictors of problems," "disaster relief specialists," "unafraid to break from the crowd mentality" and other crowning glories. Frankly, negative people are over-rated and ought to be told to "zip your lip for five minutes."
Are you giving yourself a hard way to go by being negative? Who isn't, now and then. A negative person is filled to overflowing with life regrets. Negative thinkers spend their energy on "Oh, how I wish I would have done or said...!" Don't be fooled, though. If a negatalker has what they say they lack, they will still be moaning about something else that's lacking. SO are you addicted to negative thinking and ineffective communication patterns in your relationships that ditch speedy travel on the two-way communicator highway? Of course not, not lovable you!
http://www.jobdig.com/articles/538/Are_You_a_Negative_Person%3F.html
Today, someone said to me again: "I'm having a bad week. I have a horrible attitude. I'm trying to change it around, trying to be more positive. My teenager is a help...giving me advice about attitudes and how we can vent positive to each other or negative...that it's a choice. She's really changed. I need to change, too. Nothing serious, just life stuff." Being a positive person isn't rocket science; it's all laid out on this Web site for you to USE.
ARE YOU THE LEADER OF YOUR OWN LIFE OR TOO LAZY TO RUN YOUR LIFE SHOW?
We all are addicted to negative thoughts when we allow them to run over our best-laid plans and take root in our brains. When you are being a negative person, silently to yourself or vocally to someone else, these close-minded traits are activated. They run your life show and run away with your communication skills:
1. Believing it's easier to be negative. Yes, it's easier to be negative but it's more productive to feel alive and able to be surprised and curious about yourself and your valued relationships.
2. Being lazy. Yes, every human can be lazy and do what they've always done that isn't any fun. A negative person salutes their laziness and doesn't change it.
3. Negataker. Negative people talk tons of verbal trash inside their own skulls and complain vociferously to everyone they come into contact with. The complain game is a safe haven and prison.
4. Psychocritiquer. A negative person is critical of everything and everyone. Negative people don't meet anyone they can't dislike or find fault with. They'll pick the lint off the suit or dress of successful thinkers.
5. Too smart for your own good. Mental horsepower ramps up the negative talk. Unfortunately, negative people are often pretty brainy, which adds enormous horsepower under the hood. Negative thinkers can get in trouble quickly on the relationship highway.
6. Don't care. "I don't care and no one is going to break my heart!" is the neurotically defensive battle-cry of beleaguered contrarians. They play it safe and will feel sorry some day for all the heartbreaks that life has laid in their path. Why not be a "Merryian," instead?
7. Change resisters. When you are punch drunk with negative thinking, you will use the No. 1 change resistance mechanism: criticizing self and others for a failure to be perfect. That's why I say the blame game and shame game are totally lame.
8. Un-Stupid. My definition of stupid is "being brave enough to care," and of stupid behavior as "daring to care." Pessimists are too busy picking and analyzing the lint in their belly buttons to learn something new by truly enjoying their ignorance.
Oddly, negative people are often saluted for being "pragmatists," "logical types," "fearless predictors of problems," "disaster relief specialists," "unafraid to break from the crowd mentality" and other crowning glories. Frankly, negative people are over-rated and ought to be told to "zip your lip for five minutes."
Are you giving yourself a hard way to go by being negative? Who isn't, now and then. A negative person is filled to overflowing with life regrets. Negative thinkers spend their energy on "Oh, how I wish I would have done or said...!" Don't be fooled, though. If a negatalker has what they say they lack, they will still be moaning about something else that's lacking. SO are you addicted to negative thinking and ineffective communication patterns in your relationships that ditch speedy travel on the two-way communicator highway? Of course not, not lovable you!
http://www.jobdig.com/articles/538/Are_You_a_Negative_Person%3F.html
I heard someone say, "If something bad happens to us, we will tell 10 people". "If something good happens to us we will tell only 3 people" I wonder why we do this.
I just thought about this and I realize that everyone things negatively a little bit; some more than others.
Me I always try to look at the positives and encourage when something looks really bad for others but with myself I always think badly. I think of when I was doing my drivers license I kept saying I was gonna fail and I did. Once I got positive I passed. I dunno.. I catch myself sometimes being mean to myself and I don't even know why... why am I kinder to others and more hard with myself?
Anyways, good post. I know this is an issue for many and reading this i know it applies to some of my family and friends. We all have bouts with negativity..
Me I always try to look at the positives and encourage when something looks really bad for others but with myself I always think badly. I think of when I was doing my drivers license I kept saying I was gonna fail and I did. Once I got positive I passed. I dunno.. I catch myself sometimes being mean to myself and I don't even know why... why am I kinder to others and more hard with myself?
Anyways, good post. I know this is an issue for many and reading this i know it applies to some of my family and friends. We all have bouts with negativity..
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